Category: assurance of salvation

Spiritual Alligators

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. 

12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.

Eph. 6:10-12, NASB 

Paul tells us that discerning the cosmic forces of wickedness is now critical. If we choose to ignore his words and make them optional, we will become spiritual toast. We need to hear reality. We want to be told the truth. And the truth is that we’re neck deep in spiritual alligators.

Point blank: We were each born for battle. Every believer must wear armor.

This passage in Ephesians 6 stresses that there is something sinister, an organized force, something evil, a darkness that’s focused directly on us. Verse 12 unveils to us a veritable government of wickedness. Satan leads his demons out with the intention of confusing believers and destroying holiness.

We also need to understand that human beings have a terrible knack of walking in their sin, and also by being manipulated by evil forces. Human history bears this out. We have a lousy track record. Without the Spirit we will be lost and destroyed by our own darkness.

Christians are to see life very differently than others do.

Ephesians 6 teaches us to find strength in being connected with God, which is critical to walk through in this confusing darkness. By prioritizing our relationship with Him, we can draw upon His strength and a sincere faith to navigate through all of this.

Without intimacy there is no obedience and there can be no real victory.

You must come to him humbly and holy, and sit before Him and listen, learn and love. And that is the major step in true holiness. Being controlled by Him means when you need to, you can stand and deliver damage to Satan’s kingdom.

You’ll be leading angels in this terrible battle! They have their swords drawn and are quite capable. Remember that this is a spiritual war–not physical. Your attack must be fought on your knees. And angels, they’re watching and listening to you as you pray. They are God’s messengers to protect you.

Satan presses us hard through redirection and forgetfulness of who we are.

Without the humble intimacy that can only grow on prayer and Bible reading, we will be spiritually destroyed. We need the protection of the Presence. Please don’t forget this; you need Jesus more today than yesterday. You must come closer. He will help you.

You see, your only hope is in Jesus’ strength and intimate love for you.

We must reach for our power and grab upon this intense love. We can only become strong through our intimacy with Jesus. He shields us from the spiritual corruption that swirls all around us. As we draw to Him we become mighty, as we listen closely to the Holy Spirit, we will walk in true discipleship with Jesus.

You will hear Him speak clearly to you, perhaps when you actively push to do His will than your own.

“We are a long time in learning that all our strength and salvation is in God.”

     David Brainerd

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Kissing His Feet

Luke 7:40-47

40 And Jesus answering said to him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.” And he answered, “Say it, Teacher.”

41 “A certain moneylender had two debtors. One owed five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. 42 When they could not pay, he cancelled the debt of both. Now which of them will love him more?” 43 Simon answered, “The one, I suppose, for whom he cancelled the larger debt.” And he said to him, “You have judged rightly.” 

 Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. 45 You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. 46 You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. 

47 Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.”

I don’t mean to be blunt, but how much do you love Jesus? This parable looks at the heart of the forgiven believer, the person who has been incredibly forgiven for everything–all sins, past, present and future. And it’s here we see a woman whose heart is broken by her sin, and we see that she discovers Jesus’ grace, total forgiveness and tremendous mercy.

Jesus has been invited to Simon’s home.

He’s a Pharisee, “a pure one,” one who kept the Law. So far the Pharisees haven’t banded together to attack Jesus’ ministry. It seems that there were still some Pharisees who were true seekers of truth. But that’s about to change.

The text jumps right in and we see Jesus reclining at a table (the Jewish people didn’t use chairs–pillows were used instead.) At a feast like this people who weren’t officially invited could come in to stand in the back and listen in on the conversation. (How awkward.)

Suddenly a woman bursts into the room.

She’s described as “a woman of the city,” which is a code word for “a sinner, or a harlot.” (Let your imagination roll that one around.) She comes with a purpose, for she brings a jar of expensive perfume with her.

She knows what she must do.

The passage reveals that she’s on her knees, weeping on Jesus’ feet, and rubbing His feet with her hair, and pouring out the perfume. Only a harlot would undo her hair like this. She’s even kissing his feet!

She’s obviously a broken person—yet someone who knows who Jesus is.

Living in deep sin has completely destroyed her.

And at this point Simon is deeply offended, and probably embarrassed by what’s happening. But he also assumes that Jesus isn’t who he’s saying he is. “How dare does this man let an unclean person do this!” But Jesus understands everything. His parable is short and it’s a broadside directed at Simon.

The interpretation is obvious: the man who owes the most will love the most.

Jesus accentuates Simon’s breach of protocol. The Lord deftly explains the entire situation; Simon is busted. He’s put on the spot and Jesus has made his point. It’s all so obvious. The essence of the story is clear.

How much do you love the Master?

Have you really grasped how much of your sin that’s been forgiven, or maybe you’re a Simonite—someone who doesn’t quite accept God’s forgiveness? The Bible tells us repeatedly that no one is righteous. No one, and Scripture has a very low opinion of the righteousness of men.

“But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.”

Isaiah 64:6, KJV

The Hebrew word for “filthy” is extremely graphic.

I don’t want to offend, but it literally means “a menstruating cloth or rag.” It was something that a woman used before there was Tampax. How very clear and descriptive. Human righteousness is soiled and vulgar to God.

Will we receive God’s righteousness, or will we still try to walk in our righteous filth?

Forgiveness can come only from Him–there is no hesitation or shortage on His part. Our part is to come with loving submission and brokenness at Jesus’s feet, and to fully accept the forgiveness He offers by faith.

“Christianity happens when men and women accept with unwavering trust that their sins have been not only forgiven, but forgotten, washed away in the blood of the Lamb.”


― Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel

Bryan

alaskabibleteacher.com

Yirah, Fear/Awe

Hebrew for Awe and Fear

“Let all the earth fear the Lord; let all the inhabitants of the world stand in awe of Him!”

Psalm 33:8, ESV

Whenever I’m in Northern California I simply have to visit the redwoods. Walking through them always directs me to the immense God who created these massive trees. Since I live in Alaska I’m also surrounded by stunning beauty: mountains, glaciers, eagles, forests and fireweed.

To truly see reality is to live in yirah.

I believe that God intentionally created the world to inspire awe in us. The complexity of creation is truly remarkable, with scientists dedicating their lives to understanding it. There is so much about the cosmos that remains beyond our comprehension, which leads us to consider how much more unfathomable its Creator must be.

Often missing from our lives and worship is yirah, or “awe, fear.”

Wisdom is a result of embracing awe. According to Scripture, this is a conscious choice we make. The experience of awe or fear is not imposed on us; it is a deliberate decision. It doesn’t happen automatically – we must actively choose to embrace yirah.

“The fear [yirah] of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight.”

Proverbs 9:10

Three observations I need to make. These are something to consider:

  1. Believers are to teach our children the yirah of the Lord. It must be learned which implies that it’s not something natural to us. “So that they may learn to fear me all the days that they live on the earth, and that they may teach their children so.” (Deut. 4:10.)
  2. His love for us can’t be diminished by His power and might. I believe that these three are not mutually exclusive–you can’t have one without having the other. They can’t be separated. “But with you there is forgiveness, that you may be feared.” (Psalm 130:4.)
  3. Submitting to God with awe and yirah will lead you to obedience and consistency. Loving Him becomes a joy when we respect and honor in fear of our Father.

“Just as obedience to the Lord is an indication of our love for him, so is it also a proof of our fear of God.”

Jerry Bridges

“Father, You who are clothed in majesty and dressed in righteousness, I choose to come before You seeking the fear of the Lord, which is the beginning of wisdom. I really don’t know how to do this. Teach me, O God, to hold a reverential awe for Your holy name.” Amen.

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We’re Becoming Like Jesus!

“And we all, with unveiled faces, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being transformed into the same image from one degree of glory to another. For this comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.”

2 Corinthians 3:18, ESV

“So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image.”

2 Corinthians 3:18, NLT

The above chart is in black/white. I have found out that most things are seldom black/white, and yet every once in a while I find something that helps me think. This is one of them. If it doesn’t help I apologize now. (But yet it just might be a blessing to some.)

God has made every believer holy through our faith in the blood of Jesus. And yet the Father calls His children to a walk where we become more and more like Jesus, becoming holy in every circumstance we encounter. This is called “sanctification,”

Being changed into His likeness is the dream of every Christian believer.

That driving impulse is one of our common denominators. We want this more than anything, and I have come to believe that the Holy Spirit wants it even more than we do. Looking at the above chart, we see that we’re slowly moving in that direction.

  • Not curious-We’ve all been there, and it’s very often been the prayer of others that has moved us out of our darkness. The Bible says that we are spiritually dead which is not good. Salvation is not in our thinking at this point.
  • Curious-We begin to search and the Holy Spirit begins to woo us into the love of Christ. Typically we start to become slowly fascinated by Jesus and His words. At this point we begin to question the lies and darkness that we’ve walked in. Going to church becomes a possibility. Starting to read the Bible, and we wonder about its truth.
  • Believer-We’ve finally accepted, by saving faith and repentance, the lordship of Jesus. Attending a church where the Word is taught is important. We begin to hear the Holy Spirit and respond. We begin to reach out to other Christians. We learn about baptism and the Lord’s Supper. We learn how to pray, worship, and give. The Holy Spirit has made us believers.
  • Disciple-We’re aligning ourselves to a life of disciplined obedience to the Spirit and the Word. Our faith is maturing and we’re starting to embrace training, (1 Timothy 4:7). We start to understand that the Father Himself has brought us to this place, (Hebrews 12:11). We’re becoming disciplined believers.
  • Disciple makers-We come to see that this is why we’re brought to Him. Our training is for others, and we serve Him by reaching out to those who aren’t advancing in the faith. We understand Jesus’ call to lead others into discipleship. It’s His command and we must do this. (Matthew 28:19.)
  • Life long servant-The Bible describes this stage as being a father [or mother] for the younger believers (1 John 2:13-14). We now realize that we totally belong to Him. We walked through the fire, and our confidence is now serving Jesus alone. At this point we realize we serve Him both now, and for eternity.

We often fluctuate between these different stages.

Sometimes we’re making disciples, and we can slip back to being just a believer. Nothing is written in stone. And yet there is a simple wisdom that comes when we realize where we are really at in our walk with Jesus.

Knowing this process liberates and brings us a quiet but sure understanding.

Sanctification is a process, beginning with justification and continuing throughout life. Paul calls it “straining forward” or running a race.

(Philippians 3:13-14.)

The Holy Spirit is our teacher and ever present guide. Our discipleship is under His control. A proper response is submission and humility. He takes the intricate circumstances and our unique happenings to make us like Him.

That’s exciting.

alaskabibleteacher.com

STAGES is a disciple making pathway developed by Paul Johnson of the Canadian National Baptist Convention that allows anyone to find where they are on their journey and move forward. 

You can go to Disciple Making Stages also for further study. It’s a good site.

Singing From the Pit

“I waited patiently for the Lord to help me,
    and he turned to me and heard my cry.
2 He lifted me out of the pit of despair,
    out of the mud and the mire.
He set my feet on solid ground
    and steadied me as I walked along.”

3″He has given me a new song to sing,
    a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see what he has done and be amazed.
    They will put their trust in the Lord.”

Psalms 40:1-3, NLT

Psalm 40 is jam packed with great and wonderful truth. It contains freedom for the Christian– a way out for the broken believer. We do well when we use it, and that’s what it’s there for. The deep pit has been used over many centuries as the way God teaches us to sing certain songs. But that doesn’t make it easier, does it?

Verse 1

“I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry.”

Waiting is a critical word, it should not be regarded as trivial. In our daily walk we must be patiently seeking the Lord, that comes first. Admitting you need help is the first step. And guess what? You need help. 😁

The word ‘wait’ is special, it’s kawvah in Hebrew. It can mean ‘to bind together by twisting.‘ It can be used with the idea of braiding strands of rope together. It is never a passive act that just happens. Waiting on God is to be done with intentional purpose.

Remember that the Lord is not some distant deity on a hill far away.

He’s not hiding from you. It’s really quite the opposite. He is closer to you than you think. He is responsive and aware. He hears your cries and wants to act; He is not deaf, but our patience is critical. Waiting on Him is crucial to being free. We must bind and twist our hearts and live our life to His desires.

Verse 2

He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along.

The seeable terrain can be awful, with muddy paths and mucky pits. Things that pull you down and suck you in. They’ll trap the traveler. But the Holy Spirit is quite able to lift us out. He picks us up and secures us. He uses the rope of God’s Word.

He is way more willing to save us, than we are to being saved.

Solid ground is where we are meant to be. It’s become a place of firm standing and secure footing. He makes us steady and He keeps us safe. The Holy Spirit now has intimate care over your soul.

Verse 3-4

“He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.“

Some of the greatest songs are the ones that come from those just delivered from the pit. These are ‘pit songs,’ offered to God from sincere and true hearts that have once been trapped. There’s something solid heard from the hearts of those redeemed from disaster.

These songs no longer sound religious or contrived.

“YOU CAN SEE GOD FROM ANYWHERE IF YOUR MIND IS SET TO LOVE AND OBEY HIM.”

AW Tozer

From our deepest pits come our greatest praises.

There is a passionate quality that saturates these ‘pit praises’ that is highly treasured by God, and esteemed and valued by the Church– a sense of authenticity starts to be finally heard. We can finally start to see that our pits become ‘launching pads’ of true songs of deliverance.

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Love Wears Work Gloves

 “But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?”

“Little children, let us not love in words or talk but in deeds and in truth.”

1 John 3:17-18, ESV

Love is a noble idea, it’s admired and extolled by practically everyone–we see it in our music and poetry, ethics and religion. For the most part it’s a word for something decent and virtuous and honorable. It’s a good thing, but I’m afraid it’s not always scriptural.

You see, Bible love wears work gloves.

It labors and sweats. Bible love has chores to do, and it actively looks and sees what needs to be done. 1 John 3 tells us that we shouldn’t deceive ourselves and only see the world’s definition. That love that a believer has is to be different.

Love, in John’s eyes, is most assuredly “doing.” It burns spiritual calories as it labors to serve our brothers and sisters. Love finds things it can do–it doesn’t just talk but it gets busy. Love sees the need and then gets down to serve.

“You must show sincere love to each other as brothers and sisters. Love each other deeply with all your heart.”

1 Peter 1:22

Working (serving) has nothing to do with our salvation, that is a free gift. We’re saved by grace through the blood of Jesus–that’s a given. And this serving love isn’t drudgery, as a matter of fact, working and serving each other is a joy. The deepest kind of joy there is.

Our words, although important, are really an insufficient way of proving our authenticity.  The love we serve another with isn’t “pretty poetry” kind of love. It’s so easy to just shout out truth and never ever show a working, serving kind of love. 

That disconnect is a bit disconcerting. When do we suppose we figure out that His love is actually a verb?

 

Living as His Brother

Jesus Papyrus, jerusalemperspective.com

49 And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, 

“Here are my mother and my brothers! “

“For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”

Matthew 12:49-50, (context, vv. 46-50)

His family is spiritual. Earthly connections aren’t what really matters, Jesus expresses an important understanding of the Kingdom of God. Things are not evaluated by physical relationships anymore. Life is different now.

I don’t think Jesus has gone out of His way to alienate His earthly or physical connections to His family. I don’t think He is being rude or uncaring. That isn’t part of His thinking. And yet He does seem to point to something that’s more permanent and everlasting.

It isn’t enough to be His brother, or cousin or uncle. These things really don’t matter. What does matter is being part of His spiritual family. To be painfully honest, it seems to me anyway, that the spiritual relationship is what truly counts. Being Jesus’ disciple, and doing the Father’s will for us transforms us and lifts us up to family ‘status.’

They say “blood is thicker than water.’ Jesus’ blood unites us to Himself and then to each other! Doing the Father’s will turns us into His family.

But it doesn’t strictly matter “how” you relate to Jesus so much, but how you do the will of God. That is what impresses Jesus. That’s what He communicates to those who are standing around Him. Do you really understand what is family? Can you grasp the idea that doing the will of God now makes you authentic?

We must reach out and grab this concept–we are family if we do the will of God, believe in His sacrificial work and immerse ourselves into His purposes. We become His family, spiritually anyway, when we start to do what He wants for us. Am I doing what He wants for me at this moment, or the next, or the next?

Are we really part of His family, or is someone else our father?

“The purpose of the Bible is simply to proclaim God’s plan to save His children. It asserts that man is lost and needs to be saved. And it communicates the message that Jesus is the God in the flesh sent to save His children.”

– Max Lucado

Deepen Your Repentance

Two Psalms followed David’s return to God after his sin with Bathsheba, and murdering Uriah. The sins of adultery and murder are terrible and yet David finds forgiveness from God for both. He responds properly to Nathan’s hard word. King David was a warrior of renown and a talented Psalm writer and he put together two Psalms that would guide others.

Many years ago I used an overhead projector in a class. I had two transparencies, the first projected a map on a screen showing boundaries–the second laid over the top showed the movements of an invading army. They complimented each other to show a point. One laid on top of the other to make it clear what happened. (I realized I just dated myself–I’m old.)

You might say that’s how I want to teach Psalm 51 and Psalm 32. Both are David’s serious remarks on his repentance. They’re the same incident, but incredibly different. They both explain his repentance in contrasting ways.

You see that one is a psalm; the other is a maskil.

A psalm is a guide for worship, something musical sung from the knees—an acclamation of a joyful song. The other type is different; it’s called a maskil, which is something wise and reflective, thoughtful and understanding. To write a maskil takes time to pull one’s thoughts together and share seasoned instruction.

I’ve chosen v.v. 1-2 (both due to obvious constraints of brevity.)

Psalm 51

Psalm 51, To the choirmaster. A Psalm of David, when Nathan the prophet went to him, after he had gone in to Bathsheba.

“Have mercy on me, O God,
    according to your steadfast love;
according to your abundant mercy
    blot out my transgressions.
2 Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity,
    and cleanse me from my sin!“

__________

Psalm 32

Psalm 32, A Maskil of David.

“Blessed is the one whose transgression is forgiven,
    whose sin is covered.
2 Blessed is the man against whom the Lord counts no iniquity,
    and in whose spirit there is no deceit.“

Reading the two Psalms together like this, laid on top of each other, or, like two sides of a coin, gives us an idea of David’s repentance–an clear understanding and a real depth. How did he respond to God’s message from the prophet? How can we answer others when the Holy Spirit convicts us of sin?

Both a “subjective” psalm, and an “objective” maskil is necessary I think. They both are to become the daily practice of a believer, both communicate what is needful. One sings–the other teaches, but both should be done carefully.

Perhaps another way is to see the art and the science of it all. But a caveat here. Psalm 32 blends with the autobiographical theme just like Psalm 53 does. (See 32:2-5). It even seems the objective takes on a tear or two! I guess that’s how truth in God’s kingdom works?

Our theology needs tears, and our tears need theology.

(I hope this isn’t confusing.)

I want to encourage you to take your repentance even deeper. I want to see you stir up this beautiful gift. I will want to hear your song, and then to understand your reasons for singing so beautifully.

“The Christian who has stopped repenting has stopped growing.”

    A.W. Pink

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Thinking Out Hard Things

To follow Him can be really hard. There doesn’t seem to be any contingency plans for any who are looking to escape such a drastic call. Jesus either is, or He isn’t our Lord. “Do you also want to leave?” This is a question that will be asked to every disciple–sometimes0once, and sometimes repeatedly.

There are these crystalline moments when I must make a decision. Will I take up my cross and go with Him? There doesn’t seem to be any room in Jesus’ band for ‘almost’ disciples. That scares me sometimes.

Today’s cross is waiting for me. I’m afraid at times that I won’t be able to take the next step as a true follower. Am I just fooling myself?

All of heaven seems to stand on tiptoe to see what I’m going to do next.

Who am I really?

Being obedient to Jesus is far from easy. We must have His Spirit.

“After this, many of his disciples left. They no longer wanted to be associated with him. Then Jesus gave the Twelve their chance:

“Do you also want to leave?”

“Peter replied, “Master, to whom would we go? You have the words of real life, eternal life. We’ve already committed ourselves, confident that you are the Holy One of God.”

John 6:66-69, The Message

“It is indeed praiseworthy for a believer to consecrate his life to the Lord, but he must never do so lightly or thoughtlessly. Before committing your life in service to God today, count the cost, for “No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God” (Luke 9:62).”

    Woodrow Kroll

Image from Wikipedia, verses are from The Message Bible by Eugene Peterson.

Quarantined for a Reason

Quarantines are a real possibility, even in this day. A quarantine is imposed when disease is contagious enough that it would harm a society: Measles, Smallpox, and the recent COVID-19 are just a few physical diseases where isolation must be imposed. It can be severe— an epidemic, with desperate consequences if not adhered to; in some rare cases, the use of deadly force have been authorized to maintain a quarantine until the disease is no longer communicable.

This may surprise you, but there are examples of ‘quarantines’ in the Bible. The term ‘unclean’ was used for ‘leprosy.’ Those afflicted had to isolate themselves; they had to ‘announce’ their presence when in contact with society. Lepers lived in groups away from the general populace, as a result of their disease.

In Paul’s epistle to the Corinthian he addresses another kind of ‘quarantine.’ The situation was dire; the church had advocated a Christian living with his father’s wife.

“I have already passed judgment on this man in the name of the Lord Jesus. You must call a meeting of the church. I will be present with you in spirit, and so will the power of our Lord Jesus. Then you must throw this man out and hand him over to Satan so that his sinful nature will be destroyed and he himself will be saved on the day the Lord returns.” 1 Corinthians 5:3-5

Understanding the Principal of Usefulness

“Now in a large house there are not only gold and silver vessels, but also vessels of wood and of earthenware, and some to honor and some to dishonor.” 2 Timothy 2:20, NASB

In the pantry of God, one can find an array of pots and pans, each serving a distinct purpose. Paul communicates to Timothy regarding the ‘large house’ that represents the Church as a whole. Timothy must observe the presence of both gold and silver vessels, each bearing a noble purpose befitting such a grand establishment. These are the vessels designated for the guests, appropriately reflecting the significance of the Lord Himself. Their value is inherent, as they are crafted from precious metals.

There are vessels of a different category. These are the ones made of wood, and of clay. These are part of the household, make no mistake about it. But their use is one of function, they’re utilized in common and ignoble ways. (A clay ‘bed-pan’ perhaps?!)

“Therefore, if anyone cleanses himself from these things, he will be a vessel for honor, sanctified, useful to the Master, prepared for every good work.” 2 Timothy 2:21

Paul, the author of New Testament doctrine of grace emphasizes the place of personal holiness. We are to ‘cleanse’ ourselves to become a vessel of honor. There is good news here:

All are vessels in the Father’s house. Each of us belong to Him. He alone determines their use.

Things are not yet in their final state. Change in status can be experienced. In God’s economy, clay pots can become ‘golden.’ Silver can become ‘wood.’

Some sin is indeed contagious. It influences believers, leading to a compromised Church due to our choices. At times, we find ourselves in a protective quarantine by the Holy Spirit—until the contagion is eradicated. This spiritual disease cannot be allowed to persist.

I have walked through this journey many times in my own discipleship. While these moments can be quite challenging, they come without condemnation. I remain His servant, and His love for me is remarkably unwavering. He has never turned away from a repentant child, no matter how deeply they have fallen.

“Yes, I am His servant, but I must wait out in the hall. I haven’t been faithful. So I sit in His waiting room, waiting for His call. This is for my good. And my Father knows what is best.”