When Pain is All You Can Think About

Sometimes we live in darkness. We suffer and it’s hard. We mentally accept God’s grace and His love for us, but in our heart we remain untouched. Pain saturates everything it seems. We seem to go through the motions, but deep down we’re convinced that we’ll never find the light that so many claim to have.

Since I have a disability I realize I learn things others won’t grasp. I’m learning to embrace the waves that push me to the rock–the Rock of ages. I suppose when I meet Him I’ll understand why it had to be so.

My hope is real. Heaven is home. My pain will be healed.

There is a language of heaven spoken, and those who have suffered speak a dialect of that. Just as someone from Georgia communicates English, their dialect is obvious. The same for those who live in pain. We speak the same, but differently.

Pain sometimes saturates our lives.

We live with something that is persistent, and our hope is a day when it’s all over. Psalm 88 becomes our Psalm. Nothing here is sugar-coated. It is raw and unabridged. It puts our pain under a microscope. That Psalm is entirely yours.

Psalm 88:3-4

Charles Spurgeon

Punched in the Face

Once I was punched in the face while preaching. At the time I was an evangelist with SOS Ministries in 1987. I was leading a group to Haight/Ashbury St. in San Francisco. I remember it was really busy, and it was a good team, and they were excited to take their church to the streets.

Haight/Ashbury was the place the “summer of love” kicked off, it peaked in 1968. It has a certain sense of notoriety, and even in 1983 it still had a dubious reputation as a center of the counter-culture. “A cult a day is born in San Francisco,” a pastor friend once shared with me.

Normally the neighborhood where I took a team would direct me on how to preach. Tonight especially I focused on God’s love for sinful people.

That message seemed appropriate for this place, especially on this street. God loves these people very much.

A young man came forward. He told me that he was a backslidden Christian, and his father was an Assembly of God pastor. He had run away from home. Suddenly he began to weep. The entire team seemed to lean forward and I know they were praying earnestly for him. It seemed to me that he was teetering on the brink.

His punch however came unexpectedly.

His fist hit me square in the nose. My eyes began to water. Oddly enough he took a step back and began to really cry out. My team wasn’t quite sure how to respond, but I hoped they prayed even harder. I sort of gasped and tried to shake it off. Someone must have called the police.

The Holy Spirit was very much present, both convicting and comforting each of us.

One or two minutes went by and suddenly he stopped sobbing and he became really angry. He took a step and then tried to kick me in the stomach, but I dropped the mic and caught his foot. I was ready for him this time.

About 20 minutes went by before SFPD showed up and asked if I wanted to press charges. I thought for a bit, but deep down I knew that wasn’t the will of my Father. Maybe I should of, I don’t know. But I thought about my own sin and couldn’t judge no one.

The Father was reaching him while teaching me!

God loves His prodigal children very much, He understands the guilt and shame (and frustration) they feel. The Father however is always watching and waiting. He works through life’s circumstances to lead them home. Each belongs to Him. He continues far past what we think is possible. He will never give up.

1 John 3:16

I suddenly saw a “wounded” brother, very confused and quite angry. Not with me, the team, or the music–but with God who created him, and died for him.

At that moment in time, I just happened to be God’s love for this prodigal.

You Are Under Attack

Isaiah 12:3, ESV 

One of the clearest explanations of a believer’s salvation is a well of clear sweet water. A well is a combination of effort and grace. A well must be dug, but it’s nothing without water. It’s work but it’s grace. You can dig 1000 feet, but without hitting water it’s all in vain. 

The walk of a disciple depends on the Holy Spirit. When we’re filled with Him, our life becomes supernatural. Without the presence, we stagger through the arid desert, and that means desperation. We get terribly thirsty when we can no longer draw from the “wells of salvation.” 

And of course, there is a twist when our enemy attacks. 

Our wells must be protected. We dare not get complacent. The Word takes us back to when the sworn enemy, the Philistines came against Isaac, but not with spears or chariots. They had a tactic, and it seemed to work surprisingly well. 

In Genesis 26, we can read how it all goes down. 

Gen. 26:15 

Isaac’s wells are filled with dirt. They’re unusable, and the water was no longer available to water his flocks. Now water is everything. Without water, Isaac was forced to move to another location. His flocks needed a well. 

A little background: 

God had blessed Isaac in the middle of a severe famine. Genesis 26 explains the wealth of Isaac. What he planted he reaped 100-fold. His flocks multiplied, and all because of the Lord’s favor. (Gen. 26:12-14) 

The account tells us that the Philistines were envious and jealous. They coveted his wealth. They hated Isaac, and that was filling up the wells of water with dirt. (Some suggest that these wells would be purposefully contaminated with rotting animals.) 

The water-rights were constantly being challenged out of jealousy. At least four wells were filled up by the Philistines. Their efforts were disturbing but quite effective. 

I’ve been thinking about my own “well.”

I know the enemy hates me; I’m certain of that. He wants to destroy me. My well of salvation is Satan’s target. I guess he works on shutting it down, and even works on contaminating my well. 

The last two weeks I’ve started to doubt my salvation. Being 65 now I think about death and standing before the throne and being judged by the Lord. I hear the whispers of the accuser and I get frightened.  

But I somehow keep standing. 

I then think of God’s promises. And that’s when I break out my shovel and keep my salvation open. I regularly need to do this. I have encouragers who speak into my life, (if I listen). 

God’s supernatural power is given, and I discern the enemy. I must keep my salvation open and full of water.  I need a good shovel.

The living water of God will never run dry. It fully satisfies my thirsty soul. 

What Jesus Wants Us to Know About God

14 After he had spent everything, a severe famine struck that country, and he had nothing. 15 Then he went to work for one of the citizens of that country, who sent him into his fields to feed pigs. 16 He longed to eat his fill from the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one would give him anything. 17 When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired workers have more than enough food, and here I am dying of hunger! 18 I’ll get up, go to my father, and say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight. 19 I’m no longer worthy to be called your son. Make me like one of your hired workers.”’ 

20 So he got up and went to his father. But while the son was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion. He ran, threw his arms around his neck, and kissed him. 21 The son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight. I’m no longer worthy to be called your son.’

22 “But the father told his servants, ‘Quick! Bring out the best robe and put it on him; put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. 23 Then bring the fattened calf and slaughter it, and let’s celebrate with a feast, 24 because this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found!’ So they began to celebrate.

Luke 15:14-24

Sometimes, when reading this we diminish this parable to a really nice story, but nothing more. It comforts us. It’s so evocative after all, but somehow it never enters our spiritual hearts like it’s meant to. We may mentally assent but we do not absorb what it really says.

In Luke 15 everything is lost, but is finally found. Luke 15 also has incredible theology, and is meant to jolt us like a spiritual defibrillator.

Luke 15 is magnificent in the deepest sense of the word.

The Parable of the Prodigal Son is Mt. Everest of the Bible. It requires believers to read it often and prayerfully.

Our Father runs to us because He sees our desperate hearts. His joy can’t be explained but only received. It’s just the way He is.

Just perhaps it will take an eternity to understand this simple parable? If so, we should get started now.

There are just three characters here in Luke 15:14-24: there’s the Father, the son, and the elder brother–and each plays an integral part. The prodigal is the main character, yet the father is the main focus. The son is a wastrel, a good-for-nothing rascal who blows his father’s inheritance on parties, booze, and prostitutes. He lives for the moment, he seeks pleasure in those things which will come very close to destroying him.

But haven’t we all done that?

The father represents God, who represents the loving patriarch of the parable. He’s the one who has turned over the prodigal’s portion of the inheritance. To a degree I suppose he has funded the prodigal’s descent into depravity, and yet it was the son who decided to go crazy. The father is certainly not to blame.

But nevertheless, in this story, the father is the main character. Not the prodigal.

His actions are very difficult to grasp. God behaves outrageously, and His character is difficult to understand or fathom. (After all, who acts this way?) Granted we think our earthly fathers might do this for us–but even that may be a stretch for some. Yet this parable describes how God feels about sinners.

  1. God loves sinners who know they are sinners.
  2. He is the only God who runs.
  3. He is extravagant.

Where is the New Song?

There are approximately 7,170 known living languages spoken in the world today. There are single countries like Papua New Guinea that host over 800 distinct tongues. Also I’m told the musicologists have found no human culture or spoken language that lacks a tradition of song or musical expression. Songs pour out from every tongue.

What does the scripture tell us?

Psalm 98:1, “Sing a new song to the Lord, for he has done wonderful deeds. 

Psalm 33:3, “Sing a new song of praise to him; play skillfully on the harp, and sing with joy.” 

Psalm 40:3, “He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.” 

Psalm 96:1, “Sing a new song to the Lord! Let the whole earth sing to the Lord!” 

Psalm 98:1, “Sing a new song to the Lord, for he has done wonderful deeds.” 

Psalm 144:9, “I will sing a new song to you, O God! I will sing your praises with a ten-stringed harp.” 

Psalm 149:1, “Sing to the Lord a new song. Sing his praises in the assembly of the faithful.” 

Isaiah 42:10, “Sing a new song to the Lord”! Sing his praises from the ends of the earth!” 

Rev. 5:9, “And they sang a new song with these words: “You are worthy to take the scroll and break its seals and open it.” 

Rev. 14:3, “This great choir sang a wonderful new song in front of the throne of God.” 

Tell me brother, what is this “new song” that we repeatedly see in scripture? It’s stated in the Word over and over, but what is it, and what does it mean? 

Throughout the history of the Church, new songs are sung. About 200 years ago new songs were compiled and given to the saints. One hymnal has 1,130 songs listed. If we were singing 8-10 a week, it would take over 2 years to finish without ever repeating a hymn. Honestly, this “gift of song” is a significant part of the Church. 

What is a new song? 

We sing out new things that we’ve experienced firsthand. 

When grace is finally understood and received, new songs pour out. Our music is special because it’s present tense, and although the old songs are significant, our active melodies are spontaneous expressions. They are the “now understanding” of what the Father gives. 

We must sing out “new songs.” 

All that He shows in this present moment is singable. It seems that God’s grace on us demands a song, maybe it’s even a requirement. When we receive this constant grace, we should respond in song; we become vocal witnesses of what He has freely given. It’s an active reaction to His love and mercy. 

So where are these new songs? 

Could it be that our generation doesn’t fully get it? Do we grasp His intense grace on us? But where are the new songs? Where are the melodies of grace that should be present? When we sing out, awkwardly and out of tune we honor Him, and I’m pretty sure the Father is pleased. He loves our clumsy and spontaneous songs that come from our hearts.

In some sense there are fresh and new songs coming from groups like Hillsong, Vineyard, Hosanna, and Maranatha. The groups add a “new song” dimension of grace mixed with the song. I’m grateful for them. They’ve given us good things. 

Thinking Out Loud About Dying

A dear Christian friend has built his own coffin. He now uses it as a coffee table in his living room until the day he dies. I’m told that Trappist monks next to their monastery an open grave, a constant reminder of the certainty of death. When they file past it, they understand that everyone must die.

Do you see death-smiling as a type of leer or as an evil grin upon the face of an enemy that is about to bring you pain? Or is the smile a gentle one that offers solace at a time when fear may be raging?  

Psalm 90:4-6

In ancient Israel, Psalm 39 served as a “memento mori”—a reminder of human mortality. “Oh LORD, make me know my end and what is the measure of my days; let me know how fleeting I am!” (v. 4). David understood that life is somewhat insignificant in the light of eternity.

Remember that you must die someday. 

Ecclesiastes 8:7-8

Memento mori is a reminder of the inevitability of death. Jesus’s words, “Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds” (John 12:24).

As we adopt the reality of dying we must refuse the worldly ideas of death:

  • Our fear
  • Our doubts
  • Our frustration and cynicism
  • The loneliness
  • Satanic attack

    William Gurnall

In the New Testament, Jesus exhorts his disciples to pick up their crosses daily and to remember their death as they follow him to the Place of the Skull: “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me” (Lk 9:23).

As you integrate memento mori into your life, you will find more fruit in the practice if you are able to connect within the community of the Church who are on the same journey. Talk with family and close friends about your journey.

Knowing you’re going to die and face a certain judgement is a bit unnerving. It’s also a definite way of defeating sinful habits. When we understand this, much evil is now avoided and renounced. Yes, you’re barreling into a real encounter with God. That you can be sure.

Our judgement is very much real. But we have a perfect plea. Jesus has paid the price for us. It’s His blood that delivers us and fully redeems us. Standing (or kneeling) we realize the love and mercy He has for us. When we stand before God, we stand complete.

  Helen Keller

There should be no fear of dying.

We’re fully and irrevocably forgiven. You can be sure of that. We can smile at death, knowing that it leads us into a perfect connection. Are you afraid? Yes, I understand. But know, if you’ve accepted Jesus as your Savior and Lord, the payment for all your sins, you’re forgiven.

alaskabibleteacher.com

Study Links for the Believer

25 Links for the Christian 

  1. biblegateway.com/, Many Bible translations, comparisons  
  1. thetreasuryofscriptureknowledge.com/, Cross references. A classic.  
  1. blueletterbible.org/, Greek, Hebrew dictionary, quite useful 
  1.  thebible.org/gt/index, Seven translations at one time  
  1. biblestudytools.com/compare-translations/, Another site w/ translations  
  1. bibleresources.org/parallel-bible-form/, lots of different stuff, useful  
  1. enduringword.com/, David Guzik’s commentary on the whole Bible  
  1. spurgeon.org/, C.H. Spurgeon’s resources  
  1. awtozer.com/, A,W. Tozer’s resources  
  1. desiringgod.org/articles,. John Piper’s site  
  1. raystedman.org/complete-library, Ray Stedman’s resources  
  1. onlinechristianlibrary.com/author/dwight-l-moody/ Some stuff by D.L. Moody  
  1. alaskabibleteacher.com/, Bryan Lowe’s teaching site  
  1. gotquestions.org/, Excellent site, search questions  
  1. executableoutlines.com/, 1800 outlines, topical and verse-by-verse  
  1. christian-quotes.ochristian.com/, Over 1000 quotes by Christian leaders  
  1. onlinechristianlibrary.com/authors/, good site.  
  1. betterbibleteachers.com/, Teaching kids!  
  1. precept.org/, Precept aids, needs sign-in though.  
  1. biblestudytools.com/, Bible articles mostly.  
  1. walkthru.org/resources/free-resources/free-study-guides/, excellent.  
  1. biblestudylessons.com/classbooks/index.php, workbooks, commentaries.  
  1. todayintheword.org/, Moody Bible Institute, study aids, good site  
  1. reasonabletheology.org. Books, theology, apologetics  
  1. truewaykids.com/, Reaching children, some SS resources 

I personally use some of these regularly, and can vouch for them. Some I haven’t used, but I do recognize their connections with reputable ministries, so I included them.

On all of these sites it just might take a few visits to get used to them (especially if you’re a “tech dinosaur” like me). I suggest that you explore before giving up on them.

For any reason you need to get in touch please email me at slowe299@yahoo.com.

Golly, I really hope this list blesses you somehow. Please feel completely free to bless others with this.

alaskabibleteacher.com

Our Miracle in Mexico

What happened was nothing less than a miracle. Let me explain and let you be the judge. Over the years of ministry I’ve heard the Lord speak clearly at different times. He has this tendency to overcome confusion and doubt to make His will super clear.

In 1995 we were sent by our church to Mexico to assist a church/mission station. We would be their first missionaries in Baja California. We knew we were called, and we also understood that it would definitely be challenging (and it was). We made a three year commitment.

We took Spanish at King’s Way Missionary Institute in McAllen, Texas. It was there we met another couple who would be working 40 miles south of where we were going. We agreed that once school was done we would travel together.

Now this is where it gets interesting.

We left south Texas and convoyed to San Diego. When we hit New Mexico the heat got terrible and my car didn’t have AC. The couple we were travelling with was pulling a trailer and couldn’t travel over 45 mph. It was over 100 F., I remember looking at our kids in the backseat and they were sprawled out, they were on the verge of heat stroke.

Now please bear with me.

Then something quite amazing happened!

There are several lanes available at the border crossing–they’re always backed up with 20 cars in each lane. So I pulled into one waiting for my turn to be inspected. Suddenly I heard honking behind me. I looked in my rear view to see what the deal was. It was our friends we had left back in New Mexico. They were in the car directly behind me!

My brain immediately started to calculate the odds.

It was then I heard Him speak to me.

Our three years were very difficult. We lived in a very old and very small “burned out” trailer, with no electricity or running water. We had a 55 gallon drum that was filled occasionally by a water truck. We had to boil it to kill the mosquito larva.

I killed rattlesnakes and battled with black widow spiders, and hundreds of tarantulas that wanted to nest on the property.

To know that God was taking care of us, had led us, and was using us was comforting. When things got very hard that experience at the border would comfort us repeatedly. It gave us confidence in His purposes for us being there. He put us there, and would not leave us.

When we left Mexico I was a little bit discouraged. “Where is the fruit?” About 6 months after returning to the Bay Area, I was in church when one of the elders came up to inform me that one of the leaders in our Mexico church had named their newborn son after me–Bryan Allen Rodriquez!

That news staggered me, it was like a 2×4 up the side of my head. They saw our steadfastness and wanted to name their son after me. That pretty much undid me. I admit that since then, I’ve struggled with this. I guess you can never fully understand your impact on others.

Psalm 40:5, ESV

alaskabibleteacher.com

Ponder the Word

“But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night.”

Psalm 1:2

In Psalm 1:2 the Hebrew word for meditation is hagah. In this Psalm we have a contrast between the blessed and the “not-so-blessed,” and it commands that as Jesus’ followers that we process the reality of this to become blessed by our Father.

In Psalm 1:1 the word blessed is used, and actually just in the book is Psalms alone blessed is used 51 times. The word has a very simple and concise meaning: “to be happy.” I really don’t think we can minimize how important it is to be happy.

In 1:2 we read hagah or meditate. That Hebrew word is a little bit more complicated and it seems more nuanced than “blessed.”

Hagah, or meditate means:

  • to chew a cud like a cow
  • to growl like a lion who is eating an antelope
  • to moan or groan
  • to talk to oneself, or mutter or whisper
  • finally, it can mean to muse or imagine

Yeah, it’s an interesting word and I suppose all of these meanings are to be factored into meditation [hagah]. It seems that these five definitions shape the different meanings that go into our understanding.

Using the above definitions, this is how it might look:

  1. sometimes I regurgitate the word like a cow chewing its cud
  2. at times I attack it like a lion
  3. I moan and groan as I wrestle with it, seeking for a handhold
  4. thinking about the passage I talk to myself about its meaning
  5. I imagine being there, sometimes it’s like I’m a “fly-on-the-wall”

When we come to God’s words, the Bible, we are required to assimilate all that the Holy Spirit graciously gives. When He gives us something from the Word we must apply it to ourselves. You can do this through any of the 5 definitions I’ve given.

The Holy Spirit is the One who ignites His Word into our hearts. He makes us glow for His glory.

Joshua 1:8, ESV

alaskabibleteacher.com

Have You Learned to Rest Yet?

Life can get out of hand sometimes, becoming hectic and frantic. It seems like we’ve got 1000 ‘irons in the fire.’ The anxiety of doing everything creates fear and worry. We cannot possibly keep up. There isn’t enough hours in the day.

We are not at rest with ourselves, or with the Lord.

And oh my, the news, the internet, and our cell phones create awful issues if we can’t manage them with the Holy Spirit’s direction and purposes. Our computers seem like a pipeline for darkness. Unless they’re “given” to God, they can destroy you.

What causes me anxiety? I’m quite sure you can add your own issues. But here’s a partial list:

  • ambition, self-promotion, pride, jockeying for position
  • family issues, marriage and children
  • my job and career, “keeping up with the Joneses”
  • religious ‘duties’
  • finances, bills
  • politics, media
  • unrepented sin, separation from God, peace is missing

But I assure you, there is rest.

The Old Testament uses a word, נוח or ‘nuach.’ It’s a Hebrew word. Both Moses and Jesus understood the implications. It means calming, to become quiet or still. To rest quietly.

This promise is given to Moses; frankly, he’s overwhelmed by his burden. In the “tent of the meeting” he battles with God, and it’s in that place Moses insists on the Lord’s active presence on him and on the people. He will not take another step unless God does this.

The Lord Jesus calls each of us to rest in Him. It seems we work hard and we carry awful heavy burdens. Jesus uses the word, “Come” which is typically a command or an imperative. (It can be used with an explanation mark!)

Jesus understands our hearts and our effort and “labor.” He fully grasps that we’re “heavy laden” much of the time. His invitation is to come and find the peace of a resting disciple. It is His gift to us, and only Jesus can give it to us.

 “‘Come’; he drives none away; he calls them to himself. His favorite word is ‘Come.’ Not, go to Moses – ‘Come unto me.’ To Jesus himself we must come, by a personal trust. Not to doctrine, ordinance, nor ministry are we to come first; but to the personal Saviour.”

CH Spurgeon