Category: desperate

Our Miracle in Mexico

What happened was nothing less than a miracle. Let me explain and let you be the judge. Over the years of ministry I’ve heard the Lord speak clearly at different times. He has this tendency to overcome confusion and doubt to make His will super clear.

In 1995 we were sent by our church to Mexico to assist a church/mission station. We would be their first missionaries in Baja California. We knew we were called, and we also understood that it would definitely be challenging (and it was). We made a three year commitment.

We took Spanish at King’s Way Missionary Institute in McAllen, Texas. It was there we met another couple who would be working 40 miles south of where we were going. We agreed that once school was done we would travel together.

Now this is where it gets interesting.

We left south Texas and convoyed to San Diego. When we hit New Mexico the heat got terrible and my car didn’t have AC. The couple we were travelling with was pulling a trailer and couldn’t travel over 45 mph. It was over 100 F., I remember looking at our kids in the backseat and they were sprawled out, they were on the verge of heat stroke.

Now please bear with me.

Then something quite amazing happened!

There are several lanes available at the border crossing–they’re always backed up with 20 cars in each lane. So I pulled into one waiting for my turn to be inspected. Suddenly I heard honking behind me. I looked in my rear view to see what the deal was. It was our friends we had left back in New Mexico. They were in the car directly behind me!

My brain immediately started to calculate the odds.

It was then I heard Him speak to me.

Our three years were very difficult. We lived in a very old and very small “burned out” trailer, with no electricity or running water. We had a 55 gallon drum that was filled occasionally by a water truck. We had to boil it to kill the mosquito larva.

I killed rattlesnakes and battled with black widow spiders, and hundreds of tarantulas that wanted to nest on the property.

To know that God was taking care of us, had led us, and was using us was comforting. When things got very hard that experience at the border would comfort us repeatedly. It gave us confidence in His purposes for us being there. He put us there, and would not leave us.

When we left Mexico I was a little bit discouraged. “Where is the fruit?” About 6 months after returning to the Bay Area, I was in church when one of the elders came up to inform me that one of the leaders in our Mexico church had named their newborn son after me–Bryan Allen Rodriquez!

That news staggered me, it was like a 2×4 up the side of my head. They saw our steadfastness and wanted to name their son after me. That pretty much undid me. I admit that since then, I’ve struggled with this. I guess you can never fully understand your impact on others.

“You have multiplied, O Lord my God,
    your wondrous deeds and your thoughts toward us;
    none can compare with you!
I will proclaim and tell of them,
    yet they are more than can be told.”

Psalm 40:5, ESV

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Are You Wearing White?

“They stand before the throne and before the Lamb, clothed in white robes, with palm branches in their hands,” 

Rev. 7:9, ESV 

We fail to grasp the essence of grace and its significance.

When we speak about grace, we must define it. First, grace is a free gift and kindness from God that people do not earn or deserve. When we appropriate grace as believers we understand that it gives us the power and gifts to live biblically and faithfully. We see that grace is given for both salvation and service. 

Sometimes we forget this. I wonder sometimes if we’re ‘allergic’ to God’s grace.

We fall into the trap of work and legalism! I often lose sight of my true identity before a holy God, as unmerited favor tragically tries to become merited favor. This is not biblical; it is a distortion of the truth!

OK. What about repentance? We must understand that we’re called to renounce our sin and utterly turn from it. You are called to live holy and free. When Jesus met the adulteress who was about to be stoned, He forgave her, but He also commanded her: 

“Jesus stood up and said to her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?” 11 She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.” 

John 8:10-11

The whole incident was grace, and this woman was receiving the unmerited favor of Jesus. She deserved death, she should have been stoned. But the first thing after her salvation was to live differently. This was a command to turn away from the sin which was going to destroy her. 

I’m amazed by this grace. 

Remember the thief hanging on the cross, consider the prodigal son, or the tax man Zaccheus. All three intrigue me as they found favor without meeting our own definition of repentance. Salvation seems to come by grace through faith alone. 

Perhaps grace includes both faith and repentance? I must think about this more.

Brennan Manning compassionately comments on God’s grace:

“Because salvation is by grace through faith, I believe that among the countless number of people standing in front of the throne and in front of the Lamb, dressed in white robes and holding palms in their hands.  

I shall see the prostitute from the Kit-Kat Ranch in Carson City, Nevada, who tearfully told me that she could find no other employment to support her two-year-old son.  

I shall see the woman who had an abortion and is haunted by guilt and remorse but did the best she could faced with grueling alternatives; the businessman besieged with debt who sold his integrity in a series of desperate transactions; the insecure clergyman addicted to being liked, who never challenged his people from the pulpit and longed for unconditional love. 

The sexually abused teen molested by his father and now selling his body on the street, who, as he falls asleep each night after his last ‘trick’, whispers the name of the unknown God he learned about in Sunday school. 
 
‘But how?’ We should ask. 
 
Then the voice says, ‘They have washed their robes and have made them white in the blood of the Lamb.’ 
 
There they are. There we are – the multitude who so wanted to be faithful, who at times got defeated, soiled by life, and bested by trials, wearing the bloodied garments of life’s tribulations, but through it all clung to faith. 
 
My friends, if this is not good news to you, you have never understood the gospel of grace.” 

Sharp Knife Worship

In biblical hermeneutics, the “Law of First Mention” states that the initial occurrence of a word or concept in scripture determines its subsequent understanding. Obviously the book of Genesis is a main source of these initial mentions.

In Genesis 22, we have the story of Abraham and Isaac on Mt. Moriah.

Abraham has tied his son on an altar to offer him as a sacrifice in obedience to God’s direction (v. 2). His faith is tested to the ultimate extreme. Abraham shows us how to enter into real worship.

“Then on the third day Abraham lifted his eyes and saw the place afar off. 5 And Abraham said to his young men, “Stay here with the donkey; the lad and I will go yonder and worship, and we will come back to you.”

Genesis 22:4-5

This is the first time in scripture the word “worship” is used.

It sets the singular tone for all the scriptures on this subject. I guess what’s really interesting is that there are no musical instruments involved. There were just these needful things:

  • stones
  • wood
  • rope
  • fire
  • a knife
  • and Isaac, (the would be ‘lamb.’)

When the Hebrew word for ‘worship’ was used for the first time, it was infused with the idea of a sacrifice. Abraham is the first ‘worship leader’ and he has no guitar. No piano, or drums either. No musical instruments whatsoever. No amplifier, no overhead lyrics to speak of.

Just a handmade altar, and a very sharp knife.

In the end, as Abraham raises that knife, and he is suddenly stopped, (to the relief of us all). His faith has withstood the test, and he has genuinely ‘worshiped.’

“But the Angel of the Lord called to him from heaven and said, “Abraham, Abraham!” So he said, “Here I am.” And He said, “Do not lay your hand on the lad, or do anything to him; for now I know that you fear God, since you have not withheld your son, your only son, from Me.”

Gen. 22:11-12

Principle One:

There really can’t be worship without sacrifice.

Sometimes we think that only talented and gifted people should lead worship, and maybe they should. But in reality, we all must worship, regardless of our talents or skills. Let’s remember that worship isn’t about impressing others, but it’s about expressing our devotion and commitment to God. But in the long run, there needs to be a sacrifice of some sort. It may be something small, but it’s always dear.

Principle Two:

The first worshiper didn’t use a guitar, but a knife.

This difference keeps the idea of sacrifice in its definition. I truly believe that there can’t be real worship without sacrifice. The knife thrust he was ready to use wasn’t backed up by drums or piano. Yet Abraham understood worship every step he took to Mt. Moriah with the knife in his belt.

Jesus is my Isaac, my sacrifice. He died so I now live.

We must realize our sacrifice is the Lamb of God. It’s His blood on God’s altar for our sin. As believers, our faith firmly rests in this spiritual fact. It’s a sacrifice, and He did it for us. We of all people have cause to really worship.

“God wills to be displayed and known and loved and cherished and worshiped.”

    John Piper

He’s Much Closer Than You Think

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“And He withdrew from them about a stone’s throw, and He knelt down and began to pray,”

Luke 22:41

WHO KNOWS WHAT JESUS IS THINKING AT THIS PRECISE MOMENT as he entered the Garden? His disciples waited for Jesus and scripture states that he proceeded ahead of them to find some needed strength through prayer— this verse tells us he went “a stone’s throw.”

We often share in the sorrows of the people closest to us, and Jesus wants His disciples to follow him. And they do, but not all the way. They came close, but were oblivious to the full nature of the pain that was beginning for Jesus. They slept while he agonized.

He was for the first time perhaps, needing someone close.

Many of us will make the same trip to the garden. Soon every believer makes the trip to ‘Gethsemane,’ but not as mere observers. It is a distinct place of testing and of sorrow. And each will experience it for themselves. “The servant is not above his master.”

But Jesus is close— he completely understands what it means to be alone with sorrow. The believer can lean on Jesus as the pain continues. He sends his “Comforter” to each, as he escorts us through this time. He comes in grace, and is completely kind.

He is truly just a stone’s throw away.

“God is our refuge and strength,
 always ready to help in times of trouble.”

Psalm 46:1

bry-signat (1)

Spiritual Alligators

10 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. 11 Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. 

12 For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.

Eph. 6:10-12, NASB 

Paul tells us that discerning the cosmic forces of wickedness is now critical. If we choose to ignore his words and make them optional, we will become spiritual toast. We need to hear reality. We want to be told the truth. And the truth is that we’re neck deep in spiritual alligators.

Point blank: We were each born for battle. Every believer must wear armor.

This passage in Ephesians 6 stresses that there is something sinister, an organized force, something evil, a darkness that’s focused directly on us. Verse 12 unveils to us a veritable government of wickedness. Satan leads his demons out with the intention of confusing believers and destroying holiness.

We also need to understand that human beings have a terrible knack of walking in their sin, and also by being manipulated by evil forces. Human history bears this out. We have a lousy track record. Without the Spirit we will be lost and destroyed by our own darkness.

Christians are to see life very differently than others do.

Ephesians 6 teaches us to find strength in being connected with God, which is critical to walk through in this confusing darkness. By prioritizing our relationship with Him, we can draw upon His strength and a sincere faith to navigate through all of this.

Without intimacy there is no obedience and there can be no real victory.

You must come to him humbly and holy, and sit before Him and listen, learn and love. And that is the major step in true holiness. Being controlled by Him means when you need to, you can stand and deliver damage to Satan’s kingdom.

You’ll be leading angels in this terrible battle! They have their swords drawn and are quite capable. Remember that this is a spiritual war–not physical. Your attack must be fought on your knees. And angels, they’re watching and listening to you as you pray. They are God’s messengers to protect you.

Satan presses us hard through redirection and forgetfulness of who we are.

Without the humble intimacy that can only grow on prayer and Bible reading, we will be spiritually destroyed. We need the protection of the Presence. Please don’t forget this; you need Jesus more today than yesterday. You must come closer. He will help you.

You see, your only hope is in Jesus’ strength and intimate love for you.

We must reach for our power and grab upon this intense love. We can only become strong through our intimacy with Jesus. He shields us from the spiritual corruption that swirls all around us. As we draw to Him we become mighty, as we listen closely to the Holy Spirit, we will walk in true discipleship with Jesus.

You will hear Him speak clearly to you, perhaps when you actively push to do His will than your own.

“We are a long time in learning that all our strength and salvation is in God.”

     David Brainerd

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Have You Learned to Rest Yet?

Life can get out of hand sometimes, becoming hectic and frantic. It seems like we’ve got 1000 ‘irons in the fire.’ The anxiety of doing everything creates fear and worry. We cannot possibly keep up. There isn’t enough hours in the day.

We are not at rest with ourselves, or with the Lord.

And oh my, the news, the internet, and our cell phones create awful issues if we can’t manage them with the Holy Spirit’s direction and purposes. Our computers seem like a pipeline for darkness. Unless they’re “given” to God, they can destroy you.

What causes me anxiety? I’m quite sure you can add your own issues. But here’s a partial list:

  • ambition, self-promotion, pride, jockeying for position
  • family issues, marriage and children
  • my job and career, “keeping up with the Joneses”
  • religious ‘duties’
  • finances, bills
  • politics, media
  • unrepented sin, separation from God, peace is missing

But I assure you, there is rest.

The Old Testament uses a word, נוח or ‘nuach.’ It’s a Hebrew word. Both Moses and Jesus understood the implications. It means calming, to become quiet or still. To rest quietly.

“And He said, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”

(Exodus 33:14)

This promise is given to Moses; frankly, he’s overwhelmed by his burden. In the “tent of the meeting” he battles with God, and it’s in that place Moses insists on the Lord’s active presence on him and on the people. He will not take another step unless God does this.

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.“

(Matthew 11:28)

The Lord Jesus calls each of us to rest in Him. It seems we work hard and we carry awful heavy burdens. Jesus uses the word, “Come” which is typically a command or an imperative. (It can be used with an explanation mark!)

Jesus understands our hearts and our effort and “labor.” He fully grasps that we’re “heavy laden” much of the time. His invitation is to come and find the peace of a resting disciple. It is His gift to us, and only Jesus can give it to us.

 “‘Come’; he drives none away; he calls them to himself. His favorite word is ‘Come.’ Not, go to Moses – ‘Come unto me.’ To Jesus himself we must come, by a personal trust. Not to doctrine, ordinance, nor ministry are we to come first; but to the personal Saviour.”

CH Spurgeon

Kissing His Feet

Luke 7:40-47

40 And Jesus answering said to him, “Simon, I have something to say to you.” And he answered, “Say it, Teacher.”

41 “A certain moneylender had two debtors. One owed five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. 42 When they could not pay, he cancelled the debt of both. Now which of them will love him more?” 43 Simon answered, “The one, I suppose, for whom he cancelled the larger debt.” And he said to him, “You have judged rightly.” 

 Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. 45 You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. 46 You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. 

47 Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven—for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little.”

I don’t mean to be blunt, but how much do you love Jesus? This parable looks at the heart of the forgiven believer, the person who has been incredibly forgiven for everything–all sins, past, present and future. And it’s here we see a woman whose heart is broken by her sin, and we see that she discovers Jesus’ grace, total forgiveness and tremendous mercy.

Jesus has been invited to Simon’s home.

He’s a Pharisee, “a pure one,” one who kept the Law. So far the Pharisees haven’t banded together to attack Jesus’ ministry. It seems that there were still some Pharisees who were true seekers of truth. But that’s about to change.

The text jumps right in and we see Jesus reclining at a table (the Jewish people didn’t use chairs–pillows were used instead.) At a feast like this people who weren’t officially invited could come in to stand in the back and listen in on the conversation. (How awkward.)

Suddenly a woman bursts into the room.

She’s described as “a woman of the city,” which is a code word for “a sinner, or a harlot.” (Let your imagination roll that one around.) She comes with a purpose, for she brings a jar of expensive perfume with her.

She knows what she must do.

The passage reveals that she’s on her knees, weeping on Jesus’ feet, and rubbing His feet with her hair, and pouring out the perfume. Only a harlot would undo her hair like this. She’s even kissing his feet!

She’s obviously a broken person—yet someone who knows who Jesus is.

Living in deep sin has completely destroyed her.

And at this point Simon is deeply offended, and probably embarrassed by what’s happening. But he also assumes that Jesus isn’t who he’s saying he is. “How dare does this man let an unclean person do this!” But Jesus understands everything. His parable is short and it’s a broadside directed at Simon.

The interpretation is obvious: the man who owes the most will love the most.

Jesus accentuates Simon’s breach of protocol. The Lord deftly explains the entire situation; Simon is busted. He’s put on the spot and Jesus has made his point. It’s all so obvious. The essence of the story is clear.

How much do you love the Master?

Have you really grasped how much of your sin that’s been forgiven, or maybe you’re a Simonite—someone who doesn’t quite accept God’s forgiveness? The Bible tells us repeatedly that no one is righteous. No one, and Scripture has a very low opinion of the righteousness of men.

“But we are all as an unclean thing, and all our righteousnesses are as filthy rags; and we all do fade as a leaf; and our iniquities, like the wind, have taken us away.”

Isaiah 64:6, KJV

The Hebrew word for “filthy” is extremely graphic.

I don’t want to offend, but it literally means “a menstruating cloth or rag.” It was something that a woman used before there was Tampax. How very clear and descriptive. Human righteousness is soiled and vulgar to God.

Will we receive God’s righteousness, or will we still try to walk in our righteous filth?

Forgiveness can come only from Him–there is no hesitation or shortage on His part. Our part is to come with loving submission and brokenness at Jesus’s feet, and to fully accept the forgiveness He offers by faith.

“Christianity happens when men and women accept with unwavering trust that their sins have been not only forgiven, but forgotten, washed away in the blood of the Lamb.”


― Brennan Manning, The Ragamuffin Gospel

Bryan

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Breaking Down the Door

“And He said to them, “Which of you shall have a friend, and go to him at midnight and say to him, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves;  for a friend of mine has come to me on his journey, and I have nothing to set before him’; and he will answer from within and say, ‘Do not trouble me; the door is now shut, and my children are with me in bed; I cannot rise and give to you’?  

I say to you, though he will not rise and give to him because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence he will rise and give him as many as he needs.”

Luke 11:5-8

This parable is known by some as “the Importunate Neighbor.” That’s an excellent description. Importunate is defined as being persistent, especially to the point of annoyance or intrusion. It’s tenacious and stubborn–not giving up even when being ignored, and that describes what’s happening here.

What immediately proceeds this parable is Luke’s version of the Lord’s prayer, which the disciples requested. They wanted to understand the methods and mechanics of praying–perhaps the Pharisee’s prayers weren’t quite up to snuff–they wanted more; and they insisted that Jesus instruct them.

The disciples wanted to do prayer right.

A typical Jewish home had sleeping quarters (one room!) located on a raised platform. A ladder was used to access that level (which could be crowded, sometimes two to a bed.) Often their livestock were brought inside. And when it was time to get up, everyone got up. That explains the homeowner’s reluctance to give bread to his neighbor. To get up, light a lamp, wasn’t a solitary affair.

He’s obviously unenthusiastic to make that effort.

The word used here to explain the neighbor actions is ἀναίδεια “anaídeia,” which is only used once–it’s translated as impudence, shamelessness, audacity or chutzpah. It’s a Greek word that explains the knocker’s rudeness. He won’t stop. He knocks and pounds until he gets his bread. Not having bread for his guests is unheard of, for it violates all kinds of convention.

The unwritten law of Jewish hospitality demanded action. 

This is part of Jesus’ view on prayer. It means we must be inappropriate sometimes–even to the point were we are being rude.

Immediately following this parable (the very next thought) are the following instructions:

“So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you. Seek, and you will find. Knock, and the door will be opened to you. 10 For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened.”

Luke 11:9-10

Perhaps it’s a matter of forcefulness?

We “pray” but don’t insist. We desire but don’t demand. Maybe it takes a certain shamelessness to make prayer work. Jesus emphasizes a necessary attitude to praying God’s way. It’s never automatic, but in this parable we see words that move the Father’s heart, and loosen his hand. In Jesus’ teaching, prayer means effort.

It means spiritual work. He wants us to know this. It is important.

“There is neither encouragement nor room in Bible religion for feeble desires, listless efforts, lazy attitudes; all must be strenuous, urgent, ardent. Flamed desires, impassioned, unwearied insistence delight heaven. God would have His children incorrigibly in earnest and persistently bold in their efforts. Our whole being must be in our praying.”

    E.M. Bounds

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The Rotten Chicken Within

“The heart is deceitful above all things
And it is extremely sick;
Who can understand it fully, and know its secret motives?”

Jeremiah 17:9, Amplified

“The Lord observed the extent of human wickedness on the earth, and he saw that everything they thought or imagined was consistently and totally evil.”

Genesis 6:5

The Bible in its tremendous insight, never once makes humans out to be wonderful creatures. I think we would all volunteer to be that way. But we are not. Rather the opposite is quite true. We are manipulators, rascals, liars and sinners.

There is not a single iota of evidence that we can become exceptionally kind, loving and holy people in any sense of the word.

Somehow we generate a lot of self-deceit. 

We trick our own hearts into believing that we are such noble people. We ignore evidence that would convict us otherwise. The prophet spoke to his generation in Jeremiah 17. He would speak directly to people who thought they were true and good. Jeremiah called this a lie, a serious miscalculation, especially when the opposite was true!

This is not the way “to win friends and influence people.” So many pastors, priests, elders, and leaders have a desire deep down to be acceptable and relevant. But God says, we are rascals, tricksters, phonies. Something inside is sick. There can be no human remedy. We simply cannot become religious enough to surmount our profound sin. Pride and selfishness opposes God and harms others.

As a boy living in Northern Wisconsin, on a farm somewhat, we found one of our dogs killing chickens. He was a nice dog, quite friendly and very gentle. But when he started in on the chickens my dad decided to intervene. One of the dead chickens was recovered. My father wired that dead chicken to our dogs neck, nice and tight. That dog wore that rotting chicken for several weeks. Finally the dog laid down, foaming and tongue lolling, eyes rolled back. He was profoundly sick. So Dad cut off the decaying remains.

The SPCA would have a fit. But that dog would never again chase a chicken, or even think of killing one. But even so, our sin is disgusting to God. We just seem to do evil without considering Him or others we effect. It’s all about us, as we think we can just skate through this “problem” without any issues. But Jeremiah tells us we are rotting inside.

We all carry around a dead chicken. I must tell you the truth, you’re terminally ill. You are quite sick, in the most essential part of you.

But Jesus died to free you. He’s the only One who can.

“Our life is full of brokenness – broken relationships, broken promises, broken expectations. How can we live with that brokenness without becoming bitter and resentful except by returning again and again to God’s faithful presence in our lives.”

–Henri Nouwen

We are a broken lot of confused people, and we have never solved the mystery of our own iniquity. In those rare, fleeting times we step into clarity, we are ashamed and disturbed by what we see. Our awful sin needs a wonderful Savior. Jesus does what we could never do.

Jesus died to free us from death. He has come to cut us free from our spiritual evil.

He has died to destroy our sin. But there is much more. He gives us real life–eternal life. His life!

“Come now, let us reason together, says the Lord: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool.”

Isaiah 1:18

The Thief on the Cross Speaks

Luke 23:39-43

“One of the criminals who were hanged railed at him, saying, “Are you not the Christ? Save yourself and us!” 40 But the other rebuked him, saying, “Do you not fear God, since you are under the same sentence of condemnation? 41 And we indeed justly, for we are receiving the due reward of our deeds; but this man has done nothing wrong.” 

42 “And he said, “Jesus, remember me when you come into your kingdom.” 43 And he said to him, “Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in paradise.”

The pain was incredible, but I know that deep down I deserved to die. But not like this. Never like this. I was almost out of my mind with fear. What they were doing to me was terrifying.

You must understand that I was a common thief. I had stolen a loaf of bread when I was eight years old and that’s how it all got started for me. It more or else got bigger and easier. I knew how to steal and I was quite good at it. I was Jacob, the master thief!

When I was finally caught, they sentenced me to die. I supposed it was inevitable. I fault no one but myself as I knew what I was getting into. As I dragged my beam up to Golgotha, it was really strange but I suddenly remembered a verse from the scripture and it really did unsettle me.

“Cursed is everyone who hangs on a tree.”

(Gal. 3:13, ESV)

It’s a terrible thing to die this way. There were three of us, nailed to the wood and lifted up between heaven and earth. Jesus was nailed to the middle cross, not that it really mattered; all three of us were going to die today.

Many hope for an easy death, maybe in their sleep–but that’s not going to happen to us.

The third man could only mock, he was afraid, and I suppose he just echoed those Pharisees who didn’t really understand. But I knew better. I knew who this other man was, I had heard all the stories. Deep down I knew that this man on the center cross was the Messiah.

A crowd had gathered to watch us die. The Romans in their wonderful ingenuity had made a sign that they nailed above Jesus’ head, and it declared to everyone that Jesus was “the king of the Jews.” Even as he was dying, they found a way to malign him and irritate the crowd.

The other man being crucified continued to mock Jesus, and it infuriated me.

Why I defended him I don’t know for sure.

But I understood. Jesus was murdered out of the envy and jealousy of the Pharisees. He didn’t deserve to die like this, but He was hated, and who can confront these religious men without becoming a victim. Jesus had repeatedly crossed the line, so now they were now putting him to death. It seemed evil was really winning today.

I saw the soldiers throwing dice for Jesus’ clothes. He was now being mocked by them as well, even as He was dying on a brutal cross.

But all of a sudden it all made perfect sense.

He really was the Messiah, and these bastards were killing him. Crucifixion was starting to work on me now. I began to choke on my words, and it was getting hard to breathe.

“Jesus… please remember me. When your kingdom comes, please let me be a part of it.”

And as beaten as He was, He managed to turn and look directly at me. They had whipped and brutalized Him, and yet He was still aware. His words were whispered now, but I understood. “I promise that today you will be with me in paradise.”

I was starting to spasm again.

But the horror of death had left me. Some time had passed, and I could hear his breathing stop. But for the first time, I had peace. They used a spear on Jesus, but he was already dead.

The soldiers now came to the two of us, and they were carrying an ax to break our legs. It all had to do with the coming festival, and the Pharisees wanted us dead. When they swung that ax I knew a pain that I could never describe. My own death came quickly after that.

I was suddenly standing in paradise, whole and complete, and loved.

Someone was standing before me. He was shining, and I knew he was powerful; stronger, and He was more glorious than anyone I had ever met. It was crazy but somehow I knew that it was the Lord Jesus. He had come to meet me. It’s funny, but I realized that somehow I really did belong. Me–a dirty rotten thief.

Jesus had promised me, pronouncing me righteous, me of all people. I suddenly had a joy that I could never explain. I really was a part of the Kingdom that was beyond anything I had ever known. I believed him and asked if somehow I could be part of his eternal rule.

I simply asked and He gave me everything.

“I am going to heaven just like the thief on the cross who said in that final last moment: “Lord remember me.”

Billy Graham

alaskabibleteacher.com

Cover Art: “Christ on the Cross between Two Thieves,” by Peter Paul Rubens