anxiety – Page 4 – Alaska Bible Teacher

Not a Cliché

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“A bruised reed he will not break, and a faintly burning wick he will not quench.”

Isaiah 42:3

Somehow, we can get ‘side-tracked’ in our thinking. We get confused and the enemy makes sure we don’t walk in the truth. At this present time, it does seem like some of the Church is nothing more than an exclusive club for the wonderful. It seems that those who attend are the ‘achievers,’ those who have somehow arrived at a certain acceptability.

They are there for social reasons–they eschew any real intimacy with Jesus.

For many of us, we are taught that we must have it all together; more or less complete and functioning at an acceptable level to follow Christ. We keep thinking if we work really hard then we just might arrive at a place of acceptable ‘perfection.’ This has become our religion now, this “gospel by achievement.”

But does Jesus agree? Is His Church made up of only ‘completed’ people, those who have it all together? Do we need to become accomplished before we are acceptable? Perhaps we need to find some answers. Perhaps we won’t like what we find.

After over 40 years of following Jesus (most of the time in ministry) I’m starting to realize that I’ve had much of it all wrong. I’ve read that Jesus receives the lame, the tax-collector, the leper and the whore. He deeply loves the unlovable, in spite of what the Church might say.

I believe that true grace is ‘foolish’ to man, and defies human attempts to explain it. Grace is the free, undeserved goodness and favor of God to mankind. We dare not doubt this.

“The Lord your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.”

Zephaniah 3:17

God’s love is completely undeserved. It comes without preconditions. He loves us when we are terribly lost and fallen. It has no bounds or limitations. It is unconditional. Grace grabs us and takes us to a place we’ve only dreamed about. We’re irrevocably changed when we understand.

It is a relationship and not a religion. That’s not a cliché.

This ‘world-system’ desperately wants to confuse us. We discover that Satan detests our intimacy with the Lord Jesus. He marshals all of his demonic strength in order to obscure this truth. It’s funny, but Satan likes ‘religion.’ And he hates our nearness to Jesus. (2 Cor. 11:2-3).

All of us are seeking forgiveness, and yet somehow we think that God won’t accept us. Often we stop going to church, pray, or read His Word. We are slowly becoming hard, and it seems like we are slipping into some sort of a ‘spiritual daze’. Our spiritual malaise is starting to look like it’s permanent.

But Jesus is completely enthralled by your faith in Him!

He doesn’t pull away from the ‘sick’ and the weak. You must understand that intimacy is Jesus’ idea to ‘heal’ you. He draws us to a place of friendship with God. Intimacy with Jesus is God’s exclusive way of ‘turning us’ holy. That’s why Satan militates against “first love” faith.

There is a repentance in all of this.

We need to completely change our mind about our sinfulness. His cross and His blood are enough. But it’s genuine intimacy with Jesus that cures us, not keeping rules or having excellent doctrine. We will never be ‘good’ enough, but even in our sin we are deeply loved!

He knows it all, inside and out. He energizes those who get tired, and gives fresh strength to dropouts. For even young people tire and drop out, young folk in their prime stumble and fall. But those who wait upon God get fresh strength.

“They spread their wings and soar like eagles, They run and don’t get tired, they walk and don’t lag behind.”

Isaiah 40:29-31, Message

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The Extraordinary Breath of Jesus

“Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, I also send you.” ²²After saying this, he breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit. ²³If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.”

John 20:21-23 (19-23)

This is the second “peace be with you” in this passage. So why the duplication of this peace proclamation? The disciples are sequestered and scared in the upper room (v. 19; and Luke 24:36. Having peace is being emphasized–the disciples were afraid of the Pharisees, but they were also undone by Jesus’ surprise visit.

Peace was definitely a precious commodity for them.

Jesus gives his disciples a mission to do, and they must be as ‘familiar’ with Jesus just as Jesus is with God. The disciples had followed him for three years–seeing incredible miracles, and hearing profound teaching, they’re ready, they just need power.

In track and field, there’s a relay race where a baton is passed from runner to runner, and maybe that’s how it’s working here? We see the same idea in John 17:18.

The baton has now been passed to the disciples.

The breath of the risen Jesus is necessary (and yes, he’s breathing.) What went down here, I don’t know exactly. But Jesus recognizes that his 12 followers will need this to do his work. Also, we might consider Adam in Genesis 2:7 where God’s breath brought him to life, which is pretty awesome when you think of the parallels.

The Holy Spirit energizes these men to do this new work.

The disciples were pretty much observers, but now they are to take up the ‘mantle’ of Jesus’ work. This is a definite duplication, which connects with the idea of one seed producing many others (John 12:24.) That’s how the Kingdom will come to people.

Verse 23 intrigues me. It seems that our life comes from the breath of Jesus. And it’s the Holy Spirit that gives both power and the authority that’s needed to function like Jesus. We now have the ability to pronounce forgiveness to the new believer, and yet that doesn’t seem a function of the Church today.

I wonder why this is so?

This entire passage is a real humdinger for Bible students. But it clearly declares the Churches new role as we follow in his footsteps. Disciples are to do exactly what Jesus does–with his breath and authority–filled with the Holy Spirit. We have a mission.

If we neglect these things we’re going to fall flat on our face.

“The work of Jesus for His disciples on resurrection Sunday gives an ongoing pattern for His work among His people. Jesus wants to continue this fourfold ministry of assurance, mission, the Holy Spirit and authority to His people today.”

From David Guzik’s website

Sinners Need Jesus’ Love

“And when the Pharisees saw this, they said to his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” ¹²But when he heard it, he said,

“Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. ¹³Go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, and not sacrifice.’ For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”

Matthew 9:11-13 (context vv. 10-13)

God is not against us because of our sin, rather, He is with us against our sin. Jesus wants to eat with sinners; with us!

We barely believe this. It doesn’t make any sense at all. It’s one of those pure and astonishing grace ideas that God must reveal to each person. It’s counter-intuitive to everything we know.

Don’t look now, but Jesus, (God’s own Son), is sitting and eating with sinners!

Can we even grasp how amazing this is? His guests at the table were the awful–the nasty dregs of a nice proper society. Tax collectors who had renounced Judaism for Rome. There were the sinners who were the unacceptable. (Even the whores and the drunks showed up!) Can’t He do any better than this?

We see (or read) of the Lord who chooses to fellowship with the ungodly rather than the religious. That shakes us to the core, as it should. He loves associating with unacceptable people. That alone should floor us-and maybe scare us too.

It seems to me we’re living in this world ‘blind and dumb’ to what grace really is.

The religious Pharisees found the grace of Jesus to be unacceptable. They walked and breathed legalism. Keeping the Law was their way to be acceptable in God’s eyes. And they were now angry, or maybe somewhat mystified, by Jesus’ incredible desire to associate with evil people. But they’re misunderstanding the grace and mercy that resides in God’s heart.

“Man is born broken. He lives by mending. The grace of God is glue.“

–Anne Lamott

Do we seriously understand the kindness and grace of Jesus? Does it ‘saturate’ your mind and heart? Are you completely ‘marinated’ in God’s outrageous love for you, the ugly? Think about this; ‘Could it be that the Pharisees are still alive and well today?’

Eating with sinners. We read that the Pharisees objected.

Perhaps these guys were trying to attack Jesus by ‘splitting’ the disciples from Him. They wanted them to question His actions. This is Satan’s strategy.”Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” ‘Why’ seems to be the voice of the doubter, the offended and the ungraceful.

The ‘healthy’ don’t need any help. No doctor’s appointments are necessary. And yet Jesus chooses out the sinners” instead. You need to understand this, to be called like this is the ultimate gift. Grace for the ungraceful is unreal. It seems oddly unnatural. And yet the Father’s grace is now waiting for you. You must believe this.

What are you struggling with?

What ‘distracts you? What are you trying to do to be ‘righteous’ in God’s eyes? Do you really believe that He desperately wants to sit down and have a meal with you, just as you are?

Or are you still wallowing in shame and unworthiness?

“The bridge of grace will bear your weight, brother. Thousands of big sinners have gone across that bridge, yea, tens of thousands have gone over it. Some have been the chief of sinners and some have come at the very last of their days but the arch has never yielded beneath their weight. I will go with them trusting to the same support. It will bear me over as it has for them.”

Charles Spurgeon

We Speak a Different Language

^“The servant girl at the door said to Peter, “You also are not one of this man’s disciples, are you?” He said, “I am not.”

“Now the servants and officers had made a charcoal fire, because it was cold, and they were standing and warming themselves. Peter also was with them, standing and warming himself.“

John 18:17-18, ESV

The Galileans had a distinct accent. Just as we easily identify someone from Texas just by the tone and cadence of their speech, Peter had that distinct drawl that told everyone that he came from that same province as Jesus. It was something he couldn’t hide.

Peter could not conceal his Galilean identity.

Peter was a very different man in his three years of being with Jesus. And you might say that had transformed him–and you might even say that he was now a marked man, the enemy was now quite aware of him. He was no longer a captain of a small fishing boat looking for a catch. He was now the leader of Jesus’ disciples. And he was full of fear.

The entire text (18:15-18) reveals a confrontation that Peter had with a servant girl, and we hear him making a bold-faced lie. At this very moment Peter was fulfilling the “promise” that Jesus had predicted (Matthew 26:31-32).

What was going through Peter’s head at that moment?

She was a simple servant girl, perhaps one who ministered at the gate of the high priest’s home. It’s interesting that she is the first one to question Peter’s duplicity. Most likely she was just doing her job, watching and listening. She was probably quite alert.

It’s easy to point our finger at Peter, but really, are we much different?

He was a coward, and when he was put on the spot he bailed. People hate cowards–we extol those who take a definite stand against evil. But he was frightened, scared of being connected with Jesus–the man on trial. There was much at stake here.

Just like Peter we also speak with an accent. I know it might be a stretch–but being with Jesus has fundamentally changed us. Our lives now have a specific dialect that others hear, we’re not the same people that we once were.

We open our mouths and others start to hear the Kingdom of God!

Sometimes I try to pretend that I haven’t been with Jesus, and I’m very ashamed of that. I personally battled for a long time with “fear of man.” Like Peter, I stand with the others and choose to warm myself by their fire, and I try very hard to make myself inconspicuous.

But all I have to do is open my mouth, and I proclaim who I really am. It’s really funny, but even servant girls know that I belong to Him.

“The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.”

Proverbs 29:25, ESV

Daniel, the Lion Tamer

“My God sent his angel and shut the lions’ mouths, and they have not harmed me, because I was found blameless before him; and also before you, O king, I have done no harm.” ²³Then the king was exceedingly glad, and commanded that Daniel be taken up out of the den.”

Daniel 6:22-23, ESV

I am rather frustrated with myself. I confess I haven’t read Daniel in years, and I’ve chosen to rectify this. Lately I’ve busted through this book and discovered some wonderful stuff. I guess chapter 6 has become my favorite.

A couple of things stick out.

Daniel was an incredibly faithful man, praying three times a day. He was true-hearted who served each king with the gifts God had given him. I like him a lot.

Daniel became the king’s favorite, the Hebrew word used means “prominent or esteemed.” He was the greatest and best there was to be found. You could say that he was the finest man in the kingdom.

“Then this Daniel became distinguished above all the other high officials and satraps, because an excellent spirit was in him. And the king planned to set him over the whole kingdom.”

Daniel knew how to lead and direct others. We read that he oversaw 120 chief overseers. I suspect he knew a thing or two about good leadership. Daniel understood his work, and it seems that he instinctively knew what good government required.

But Daniel was a victim of jealousy. A concerted effort, carefully planned and directed was meant to destroy him. Although the leaders of this rebellion could find nothing to accuse him of, they resorted to trap him because he prayed to God. Faithfully and consistently.

Their plot worked. These officials, through their twisting and manipulation of the legal code, were able to sentence Daniel to death. It seems being fed to hungry lions was the penalty for “breaking the law.”

Sometimes we must choose to serve God, even if it means breaking men’s laws.

“But Peter and the apostles answered, “We must obey God rather than men.”

Acts 5:29

Daniel was over 90 years old when he was thrown to the lions. Even in his advanced years he kept up serving God. The passage declares that he had “an excellent spirit.”

The lions, (several I assume), were not at all interested in devouring Daniel. King Darius however was incredibly distraught over Daniel’s execution, but it seems he was forced into it. The passage tells us that the king was so distressed that he couldn’t sleep that night.

Undoubtedly, Daniel slept far better then Darius.

To be faithful to the Lord God may require us to sleep with lions, but we can be assured of the Holy Spirit’s presence with us even then. A verse in Hebrews suggests “faith” protects us from the strong jaws of the enemy. Daniel understood.

“Who through faith conquered kingdoms, enforced justice, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions,”

Hebrews 11:33

But yet, sometimes even the faithful will be eaten.

Sometimes the lions will devour believers. But we must trust and believe no matter what happens. Hebrews goes on to show us the extremity of the faithful. Read Hebrews 11:35-38 and you’ll understand what I mean. Being faithful can be very difficult. Bad things often happen.

*****

Some side thoughts. Prayer is intensely powerful. Daniel’s strength became the enemy’s focus and attack. That should give us understanding into the power we wield. But, do we use it?

Also, 1 Peter 5:8 explains much for the believer–

“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.”

It’s been said that the “blood of the martyrs is the seed of the Church.” We really must understand this, especially now.

“The apostles went away rejoicing that they were counted worthy to suffer shame for the name of Christ, that they were graced so far as to be disgraced for the name of Christ!”

Thomas Watson

A Rose in the Snow

Merry Christmas, dear ones!

I’m looking at Christmas 1000 years from today, when He will bring us all together. I think that we’ll all kick back, and we will try to remember Christmas, 2023. We will most likely say, “But that was so long ago, it feels like a dream, I’m not so sure now…”

Like me, I trust your deepest hopes are pinned on an incredible grace.

Under the tree there are gifts. But we have been given a gift– of gifts. It is something that ‘rocks our world’. It’s called ‘eternal life’. It has been given to us freely, and without any stipulations. We’ve been ‘cut-loose’ from the tangled mass of sin. We are now very much free.

I know I need to learn to live like a free man.

My physical and mental illnesses often trips me up. I’m saddened by my weaknesses. But I reach out and touch this grace, I pull it in and take and make it my own. Jesus has freed me, and I want to walk in truth, with Him—and with you.

I’m grateful for my doctors, they’re definitely a blessing. I must keep looking to my rose–my Jesus who is my Savior. I covet your prayers especially now.

Our Lord Jesus is truly a “rose in the snow.” He has come to this mean and hostile world, but He is precious and beautiful in the eyes of the faithful. I pray that you find Him flourishing in your heart.

Love to you from alaskabibleteacher!

A Weeping Mother

²¹Then Jesus went out from there and departed to the region of Tyre and Sidon. ²²And behold, a woman of Canaan came from that region and cried out to Him, saying, “Have mercy on me, O Lord, Son of David! My daughter is severely demon-possessed.”

²³But He answered her not a word. And His disciples came and urged Him, saying, “Send her away, for she cries out after us.” ²⁴But He answered and said, “I was not sent except to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.”

²⁵Then she came and worshiped Him, saying, “Lord, help me!”

²⁶But He answered and said, “It is not good to take the children’s bread and throw it to the little dogs.”²⁷And she said, “Yes, Lord, yet even the little dogs eat the crumbs which fall from their masters’ table.”

²⁸Then Jesus answered and said to her, “O woman, great is your faith! Let it be to you as you desire.” And her daughter was healed from that very hour.

Matthew 15:21-28, ESV

My daughter had a demon living inside her. Please understand me, I love her more than life itself. It was a terrible torment to see her fall under the control of the evil one like this. Every day seemed worse than the previous, and I knew that the day would come that I would lose her completely to the dark pit.

She would be lost forever.

God knows I tried everything. There was the pagan temple to Eshmon. He was our god of healing and protection for our nation, and it was a short walk away. We made trips there to present ourselves for healing. But things got worse, not better.

When Jesus came we knew we had to meet Him.

I was desperate, at the very end of my rope. I was scared. Meeting Jesus’ disciples was the first step and it really didn’t go well at all. They protected Him, and I couldn’t get close enough to speak with Him.

So much was blocking me. I saw so many obstacles, but when your child is suffering like mine, these things mean nothing. I came to the point where I began to shout, over and over for Jesus to intervene. I was asked to stop, I ignored His followers and kept yelling.

This passage asks us to consider many heavy issues. We have questions that need answers. Why did Jesus seem so cold and harsh? What about the “dog” reference, and His seemingly reluctance to heal? What about her ethnicity as a pagan?

Did Jesus know something about the situation we don’t?

I really want to keep this post short, so I won’t try to answer these questions. But the situation is intriguing. It must be noted that Jesus, at this particular point in His ministry, is focusing on reaching the Jewish population. (But that will change in the future.)

And yet there are positive characteristics of this woman that must be considered. These need to be understood to open up this passage. Please ponder them, they put the entire situation in a different light. We see the following:

Her humility
Her patience
Her prayer and worship
Her persistence
Her faith

Each of these are crucial, and Jesus saw them. Yes, we see the obstacles, but we understand her love for her demon possessed daughter that drives her into Jesus’ presence. We see her faith that won’t give up no matter the resistance she encountered.

“Faith sees the invisible, believes the unbelievable, and receives the impossible.“

Corrie Ten Boom

What Does God Want From You?

I plead for you not to skip this post.

“He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous and looked down on everyone else:

“Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. ¹¹The Pharisee was standing and praying like this about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I’m not like other people—greedy, unrighteous, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. ¹²I fast twice a week; I give a tenth of everything I get.’”

¹³“But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even raise his eyes to heaven but kept striking his chest and saying, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner!’”

Luke 18:9-13

He despised others. As a Pharisee, he prided himself as a holy person; he thought he stood before God accepted and pure. He congratulated himself over this. I’m starting to see that self-righteousness has many levels. You can be blatant and obvious about it, or perhaps it might be more subtle and hidden. (Many believers like it hidden.)

We have to understand that God sees all and our hearts and minds are continuously inspected by the Holy Spirit. God sees our hearts as we see the faces of our friends. Any presence of pride or the absence of humility is automatically rejected by our heavenly Father.

In the Bible, it’s quite clear that being humble and admitting our sins and flaws are the best way to counteract any kind of puffed up pride. But for some reason, we often don’t realize when our selfishness and ego is getting in the way. It often comes very, very subtle. Tricky maybe.

Humility is a quality that cannot be acquired or maintained permanently.

Humility is not an accomplishment. There are no spiritual medals given for humility and brokenness. It’s not once you’re done. We must find humility every single day. Every morning, when my feet hit the floor, it’s something that requires my daily effort and practice. But it’s scary, because I’m starting to see that God’s precious grace is ultimately nullified by my pride.

The right kind of heart is broken and humble every single morning.

The Pharisee believes he is better than the tax-collector, and he now stands confidently before God. He thinks he is holy and superior to others. He really believes he has spiritually arrived.

But the tax-collector was brutally honest about himself. He understood the presence of God.

He didn’t need anyone to tell him how sinful he was–he knew his own wickedness. Jesus’ story reveals God’s love for those who know that they’re twisted up inside and lost. But let’s look closer at the heart of the tax-collector:

“He stood afar off,” which showed his awareness of his separation from God.
“He wouldn’t even raise his eyes to heaven,” which declared his humility in the presence of a holy God.
He kept “striking his chest,” which tells us of a deep pain over his sin against God.
He prayed, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner!’ This describes his desperate heart.

Both men came to pray, but to be really honest, that’s all they had in common.

The Pharisee came to the temple to declare his righteousness, the tax-collector came out of a terrible despair. It strikes me that the text in verse 11 says the Pharisee, “began praying to himself.” It seems that his prayer never really met God–all he was proud and showy, and he was only doing those things God hates (Prov. 29:23).

But it was the tax-man who became righteous in the eyes of God.

Humility is the foundation of the kingdom of Jesus. Matthew 5:3-4, makes a lot of sense to me. To be “poor in spirit” and to “mourn” has now become the solid bedrock of a Christian’s discipleship. To be justified (made right) is a gift. No one can earn salvation. The tax-man could only hold out his empty cup and hoped that God would fill it. Maybe that’s our beginning point.

But suddenly the tax collector is now considered righteous, while the Pharisee left the temple unchanged, and unforgiven.

“We had long known the Lord without realizing that meekness and lowliness of heart should be the distinguishing feature of the disciple.”

Andrew Murray

When I crawl out of bed in the morning I start all over again. I realize I am nothing, I deserve nothing. I can only cling to the grace of my Father.

God wants us to have a broken heart and it’s apparent He rejects everything else. I suppose that there are questions I must ask myself: Am I really poor in spirit? Do I really mourn over my sin? Am I broken or am I subtly proud of myself? I must ask myself these questions.

“This is the Lord’s declaration. I will look favorably on this kind of person: one who is humble, submissive in spirit, and trembles at my word.”

Isaiah 66:2, CSB

Art by Eugène Burnand

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A Legion of Demons

Mark 5:1-15

“They came to the other side of the sea, to the region of the Gerasenes. ²As soon as he got out of the boat, a man with an unclean spirit came out of the tombs and met him. ³He lived in the tombs, and no one was able to restrain him anymore—not even with a chain— ⁴because he often had been bound with shackles and chains, but had torn the chains apart and smashed the shackles. No one was strong enough to subdue him. ⁵Night and day among the tombs and on the mountains, he was always crying out and cutting himself with stones.“

⁶When he saw Jesus from a distance, he ran and knelt down before him. ⁷And he cried out with a loud voice, “What do you have to do with me, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? I beg you before God, don’t torment me!” ⁸For he had told him, “Come out of the man, you unclean spirit!”

⁹“What is your name?” he asked him.

“My name is Legion,” he answered him, “because we are many.” ¹⁰And he begged him earnestly not to send them out of the region.

¹¹A large herd of pigs was there, feeding on the hillside. ¹²The demons begged him, “Send us to the pigs, so that we may enter them.” ¹³So he gave them permission, and the unclean spirits came out and entered the pigs. The herd of about two thousand rushed down the steep bank into the sea and drowned there.

¹⁴The men who tended them ran off and reported it in the town and the countryside, and people went to see what had happened. ¹⁵They came to Jesus and saw the man who had been demon-possessed, sitting there, dressed and in his right mind; and they were afraid.

I had so many demons inside me, people called me Legion. I ruled the spiritual world of the Garasenes. People were afraid of me, of what I would do to them. Believe me, they knew. I was a living nightmare, their boogeyman. My days was filled with awful confusion and terror.

And I was completely insane.

I can recall little through my darkness, and I suppose that was for the best. My madness permeated everything. My life had become completely saturated with evil. What little I know I will tell you.

Try to imagine the condensed insanity of a mental hospital crammed into one’s little brain.

That day, I was on the Gerasenes’ “welcoming committee.” I ran to greet Jesus before he even got out of the boat. I remember falling at His feet. I knew instinctively who He was. He was the Lord over my darkness. I suppose that deep down I knew that only He could free me.

The authority of Jesus enabled him to speak directly to my demons. I remember how they tried to negotiate their way out, but with His total authority over darkness, He calmly sent them into a herd of swine nearby.

There were about 2,000 pigs, and when my evil spirits left me, they entered them. The pigs went berserk, squealing and running. I was told later that they destroyed themselves. They couldn’t handle all the evil that I had ‘bottled up’ inside me.

With Jesus’ firm and decisive command, the darkness immediately left me alone.

Suddenly, I could no longer hear the demon’s vile words. I knew that I would no longer have to carry out their disgusting will. There were no longer voices in my head. I stood up as a free man, now walking in the light. Jesus Christ had decisively intervened.

Someone gave me a robe to cover up my nakedness. I sat at Jesus’ feet in a wonderful daze at what had just happened, and it didn’t take long for the townspeople to arrive. They came and found me clothed and completely sane. I suppose it was out of fear that they asked Jesus to leave the region immediately.

I only wish they understood who He really was.

When Jesus was getting into the boat I wanted to join Him. I simply had to be close to Him. But Jesus told me no. He told me that I needed to go home to my family, and I must tell them everything. “Tell them all of the power and mercy I have had on you.” As I watched them sail away I knew that I wanted to do what He asked.

I would now be Jesus’ ambassador to the Ten Towns.

I explained to them everything that had happened to me and all that Jesus could do. I was now His very visible witness. I shared about the power and authority of the Lord Jesus Christ over my incredible darkness. I was now a source of His light to my people.

I had to witness to the others, and it would be my joy to do so.

Lord Jesus, You completely rule the spiritual forces of darkness. Help me to remember this and assist me with my own dark issues. I want to be free from all that opposes You. I must tell others of what you’ve done for me. Amen.

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Only Two Pennies

Mark 12:41-44

^41-44Sitting across from the offering box, he was observing how the crowd tossed money in for the collection. Many of the rich were making large contributions. One poor widow came up and put in two small coins—a measly two cents. Jesus called his disciples over and said, “The truth is that this poor widow gave more to the collection than all the others put together.”

“All the others gave what they’ll never miss; she gave extravagantly what she couldn’t afford—she gave her all.”

It wasn’t much but it’s all I had. Some might laugh–but truthfully, I really wasn’t giving just my money, I was giving my heart. That’s really all I had, simply my heart.

When my husband died, I was left with very little. What I did have I hid in a hole in the wall, but I was concerned, money was going out and nothing was coming in. Often I sat on my stool and stared at that hole, and I was frightened. There is nothing to live on. What was I going to do?

You must understand. No one was going to help me.

I got up one morning to pull out the leather sack, all that was there were two pennies. That’s it. Two very small pennies, and that’s all I had to live on! I knew that this day would come, but it seemed to come so soon. I was afraid of what was going to happen to me, a widow that had nothing.

There were six stone receptacles placed in strategic spots, where people could tithe as the Law required of every Jew. Occasionally there was a procession: trumpets blowing and bright banners waving. Another rich man announced to everyone that he was coming to contribute to the Temple.

Jesus was watching closely to all of this.

Suddenly an old woman came to give, and there were no trumpets, no fanfare. She simply came to give what she had–two very small copper pennies. Just two pennies. Most would laugh I suppose. After all, the rich were dropping in thousands of silver.

Jesus turned to His disciples. They sat and listened carefully to what He had to say:

“Truly, I say to you, this poor widow has put in more than all those who are contributing to the offering box.”

They gasped as they struggled to understand the Teacher. It seemed idiotic, but Jesus often said many outrageous things. You could see their minds working to grip this. It made absolutely no sense to their carnal minds.

“They all contributed out of their abundance, but she out of her poverty has put in everything she had, all she had to live on.”

The twelve were dumbfounded.

When I gave, I gave my heart. I had nothing, but you have to understand, a strange peace came over me. I rejoiced to give to God and His work. Yes, I now had nothing–nothing but the grace and care of God. Maybe I was a fool. Maybe I was stark raving mad. But I knew what I wanted to do. When I threw in my two pennies, I threw myself into the heart and care of God.

What was going to happen next? I really don’t know, but we will find out, won’t we?

“Don’t be afraid, you tiny flock! Your Father plans to give you the kingdom. Sell your possessions and give the money away. Get yourselves purses that never grow old, inexhaustible treasure in Heaven, where no thief can ever reach it, or moth ruin it. For wherever your treasure is, you may be certain that your heart will be there too!”

Luke 12:33, Phillips

Art: Coin Week; verses used are from The Message, a translation of Eugene Peterson