Category: failure

The Giant Goliath, and Sexy Bathsheba

I have wondered about this. It strikes me that there are two giants that David encountered in his walk with God. Granted, there are many other events and people that he experienced, obviously. But there are these two that stick out:

The Goliath showdown, and the Bathsheba fiasco.

These seem to be hinges or pivot points that would change the entire course of king David’s life, and his faith in God. They’re to be an encouragement and warning to us, as both are incredibly significant.

Goliath, 1 Samuel 17

This is a powerful chapter, for it reveals David’s spectacular faith in God. When the boy David killed Goliath it changed the entire future of Israel. One stone from his sling was all it took. Israel routed the Philistine army. David’s faith was the spark that made victory real.

David became a hero that day, and quickly ascended into Saul’s favor. It was both a military and a political development that Israel needed and king Saul welcomed it, the kingdom thrived. The boy David became the man of the hour, a national hero which everyone talked about.

I’d like to point out that David had already been anointed by Samuel to be the next king. This, combined with David’s celebrity status pushed king Saul over the edge–Saul developed a deep resentment that became insanity. David handled this adroitly, fleeing into the wilderness (with his faith) for years.

Bathsheba, 2 Samuel 11

At this point David is now king and is fighting the Ammonites. The Israelites were besieging Rabbah, the capital city of that country, and it seems like it’s an intense battle. But interestingly enough, David remained in Jerusalem. (And I can’t figure out why.) David can’t sleep so he paces the rooftop and it’s then things get crazy.

David spies Bathsheba who is cleansing herself from her monthly cycle. She is a very beautiful woman, and king David inquires about her. He lusts after her which results in him more or less raping her, commiting adultery and then murdering her husband. This is all very disturbing.

Bathsheba is the wife of Uriah, one of David’s mighty men of proven valor. He has him murdered after committing adultery with her.

(2 Sam. 11:14-15.)

When David had sex with Bathsheba it set in motion the ugliest chain of events imaginable. It seems that up to now David has taken the intiative of events, and then, after this great evil, his story shifts and for the rest of his life he becomes acted upon, a “victim.” He reacts, but doesn’t act anymore.

For the rest of his life he will struggle. All because of lust.

In 2 Samuel 12 David is confronted by a prophet for these sins. Samuel speaks with a parable that penetrates David’s heart. The king responds, “he shall restore the lamb fourfold, because he did this thing, and because he had no pity,” (v. 6). And interestingly enough, David would indeed pay fourfold. There would be four major incidents after this that he would now face.

Summary

David faced two “giants” in his walk with God. They were very different but both life altering. He killed Goliath but was not able to destroy his lust with Bathsheba.

Sometimes one “giant” is not enough. It would be nice if that was the case. David walked in victory for a period of time, but failed both himself, his family and his kingdom. Lust always is an act of the will, a deliberate decision that destroys all that it touches. David would be forgiven, but the damage was already done.

There would be dire consequences for everyone.

I believe that our giants were meant to be slaughtered. That is their function and purpose for the faithful believer. There can be no compromise. They’ll take different forms and will often approach you in peculiar ways. Paul tells us to wear God’s armor in Ephesians 6:11-18. I don’t think that protection should be taken off–you dare not only wear it only on special occasions.

Brother, sister–you must be covered all the time.

King David is a lesson for us. There is tremendous pain for us if we deliberately choose to compromise with the giants in our lives. Some of you already understand this; others will. I promise you.

“Many of us suffer from temptations from which we have no business to suffer.”

    Oswald Chambers

Bryan Lowe

alaskabibleteacher.com

When Water Became a Sidewalk

24 The boat by this time was a long way from the land, beaten by the waves, for the wind was against them. 25 And in the fourth watch of the night he came to them, walking on the sea. 26 But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified, and said, “It is a ghost!” and they cried out in fear. 27 But immediately Jesus spoke to them, saying, “Take heart; it is I. Do not be afraid.”

And Peter answered him, “Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water.” 29 He said, “Come.” So Peter got out of the boat and walked on the water and came to Jesus. 30 But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink he cried out, “Lord, save me.” 31 Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him, saying to him, “O you of little faith, why did you doubt?”

Matthew 14:24-31

Peter is speaking:

It was the dead of night–the fourth watch, sometime between 3-6 a.m. The crossing was going all wrong, the water and wind were contrary, and we were exhausted. We had worked hard and made little headway. I seldom have seen anything like this, and the waves were pounding our boat. We had no idea how long we could keep this up.

Someone shouted and started pointing. We all looked, and quickly came to the realization that it was Jesus–but that was impossible. It had to be His “ghost.” He was walking on water, calming striding toward us. As absurd as it seems now, we believed that. After all, what we were all seeing defied reason. No way, it was impossible!

As He got closer to our boat when it shouted to us.

We all knew Jesus’ voice—and He was telling us not to be afraid, He understood our fear and He wanted us to know that we were in God’s hands. Our terror got mixed up in skepticism. After all, it had been a long day and this just doesn’t happen. Besides we knew that Jesus was left back in Gaiilee.

I don’t know why to this day where my courage came, but I needed to be with Jesus. Maybe it was curiosity, maybe it was more than that. Somewhere I came up with this wild idea that if He was really Jesus then He could allow me to walk on the water. I know that seems bizarre, but my “faith” in Him was greater than anything else.

Jesus told me to join Him.

So guess what? I stepped out of the boat.

The water was as solid as if I were walking on land! I couldn’t figure that out, it was impossible. Completely unbelievable. I saw the waves and felt the wind–My eyes shifted from Jesus and it was then I began to sink. The water was becoming water, and I began to sink.

“Jesus, save me!”

If there was any lesson that cry moved the heart of Jesus. Perhaps that’s what has shaped my ministry today. The cry of desperation has become an integral part of my walk. At that moment I realized that is my best prayer. “Master, save me!” I use it a lot. Especially when I’m “sinking.”

Jesus grabbed me.

I was pulled up and out of the water to safety. He gently spoke a rebuke–a kind word of instruction and direction. But I learned something.

Following Jesus is a supernatural walk.

It can’t be done in any other way. And you must get out of the safety of the boat, which must come at His invitation. He wasn’t angered by my unbelief, but I believe He was encouraged by my faith, and the lesson was clearly understood by the disciples still in the boat.

“The steps of faith fall on the seeming void, but find the rock beneath.“

    John Greenleaf Whittier

alaskabibleteacher.com

Sinners Need Jesus’ Love

“And when the Pharisees saw this, they said to his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” 12 But when he heard it, he said, 

“Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. 13 Go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, and not sacrifice.’ For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”

Matthew 9:11-13 (context vv. 10-13)

God is not against us because of our sin, rather, He is with us against our sin. Jesus wants to eat with sinners; with us!

We barely believe this. It doesn’t make any sense at all. It’s one of those pure and astonishing grace ideas that God must reveal to each person. It’s counter-intuitive to everything we know.

Don’t look now, but Jesus, (God’s own Son), is sitting and eating with sinners!

Can we even grasp how amazing this is? His guests at the table were the awful–the nasty dregs of a nice proper society. Tax collectors who had renounced Judaism for Rome. There were the sinners who were the unacceptable. (Even the whores and the drunks showed up!) Can’t He do any better than this?

We see (or read) of the Lord who chooses to fellowship with the ungodly rather than the religious. That shakes us to the core, as it should. He loves associating with unacceptable people. That alone should floor us-and maybe scare us too.

It seems to me we’re living in this world ‘blind and dumb’ to what grace really is.

The religious Pharisees found the grace of Jesus to be unacceptable. They walked and breathed legalism. Keeping the Law was their way to be acceptable in God’s eyes. And they were now angry, or maybe somewhat mystified, by Jesus’ incredible desire to associate with evil people. But they’re misunderstanding the grace and mercy that resides in God’s heart.

“Man is born broken. He lives by mending. The grace of God is glue.“

–Anne Lamott

Do we seriously understand the kindness and grace of Jesus? Does it ‘saturate’ your mind and heart? Are you completely ‘marinated’ in God’s outrageous love for you, the ugly? Think about this; ‘Could it be that the Pharisees are still alive and well today?’

Eating with sinners. We read that the Pharisees objected.

Perhaps these guys were trying to attack Jesus by ‘splitting’ the disciples from Him. They wanted them to question His actions. This is Satan’s strategy.”Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” ‘Why’ seems to be the voice of the doubter, the offended and the ungraceful.

The ‘healthy’ don’t need any help. No doctor’s appointments are necessary. And yet Jesus chooses out the sinners” instead. You need to understand this, to be called like this is the ultimate gift. Grace for the ungraceful is unreal. It seems oddly unnatural. And yet the Father’s grace is now waiting for you. You must believe this.

What are you struggling with?

What ‘distracts you? What are you trying to do to be ‘righteous’ in God’s eyes? Do you really believe that He desperately wants to sit down and have a meal with you, just as you are?

Or are you still wallowing in shame and unworthiness?

“The bridge of grace will bear your weight, brother. Thousands of big sinners have gone across that bridge, yea, tens of thousands have gone over it. Some have been the chief of sinners and some have come at the very last of their days but the arch has never yielded beneath their weight. I will go with them trusting to the same support. It will bear me over as it has for them.”

    Charles Spurgeon

We Speak a Different Language

“The servant girl at the door said to Peter, “You also are not one of this man’s disciples, are you?” He said, “I am not.” 

“ Now the servants and officers had made a charcoal fire, because it was cold, and they were standing and warming themselves. Peter also was with them, standing and warming himself.“

John 18:17-18, ESV

The Galileans had a distinct accent. Just as we easily identify someone from Texas just by the tone and cadence of their speech, Peter had that distinct drawl that told everyone that he came from that same province as Jesus. It was something he couldn’t hide.

Peter could not conceal his Galilean identity.

Peter was a very different man in his three years of being with Jesus. And you might say that had transformed him–and you might even say that he was now a marked man, the enemy was now quite aware of him. He was no longer a captain of a small fishing boat looking for a catch. He was now the leader of Jesus’ disciples. And he was full of fear.

The entire text (18:15-18) reveals a confrontation that Peter had with a servant girl, and we hear him making a bold-faced lie. At this very moment Peter was fulfilling the “promise” that Jesus had predicted (Matthew 26:31-32).

What was going through Peter’s head at that moment?

She was a simple servant girl, perhaps one who ministered at the gate of the high priest’s home. It’s interesting that she is the first one to question Peter’s duplicity. Most likely she was just doing her job, watching and listening. She was probably quite alert.

It’s easy to point our finger at Peter, but really, are we much different?

He was a coward, and when he was put on the spot he bailed. People hate cowards–we extol those who take a definite stand against evil. But he was frightened, scared of being connected with Jesus–the man on trial. There was much at stake here.

Just like Peter we also speak with an accent. I know it might be a stretch–but being with Jesus has fundamentally changed us. Our lives now have a specific dialect that others hear, we’re not the same people that we once were.

We open our mouths and others start to hear the Kingdom of God!

Sometimes I try to pretend that I haven’t been with Jesus, and I’m very ashamed of that. I personally battled for a long time with “fear of man.” Like Peter, I stand with the others and choose to warm myself by their fire, and I try very hard to make myself inconspicuous.

But all I have to do is open my mouth, and I proclaim who I really am. It’s really funny, but even servant girls know that I belong to Him.

“The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.”

Proverbs 29:25, ESV

Jonah Measures God’s Love

“That is why I made haste to flee to Tarshish…

…for I knew that you are a gracious God and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love, and relenting from disaster.” (Jonah 4:2, ESV)

(“The LORD is gracious and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.”)

Psalm 145:8

This understanding of God’s character is used 13x in the Old Testament. It was first discerned by Moses, and was passed on to other men. It was stamped into the hearts of those who followed him. It was a description of who God was, and it became the strong foundation of their ministry.

Jonah understood who God really was.

And that was the reason Jonah refused to give the Ninevites a break. He didn’t want them to repent. He wanted no part of their salvation, which is rather disturbing. How can a prophet act this way? What was it that angered Jonah that he would resist God?

The book of Jonah contains question marks, especially chapter 4. Of the 14 questions that are asked, 11 are directed at Jonah.

God speaks loud and clear to His prophet. He asks Jonah to reconsider and evaluate his heart in the light of God’s loving character.

When we read it we can focus on the secondary ideas. We see Jonah and the whale. Maybe we think about his disobedience. Or maybe the storm or the plant that helped Jonah endure the heat of the sun. These are all good things to consider, but they are not the main theme.

God’s heart for even the Ninevites is the main purpose of the book of Jonah.

God is not the exclusive ‘property’ of the Hebrew nation! He very much cares for others outside of our own group. In John 3:16 we’re made aware of His passion for the whole earth.

“For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son…”

The Great Commission has always been in effect. In the OT Israel was called to be a light to the Gentiles, Acts 13:46-48. The covenant given to Abraham was that Israel would be a blessing to every nation. This was God’s plan and His intention. (Genesis 17:1-8.)

Jonah’s anger and apparent prejudice is definitely a cause for concern.

But could the message of Jonah describe the reluctance of the Church today? Is God’s love for everyone? Does God even care?

“And should not I pity Nineveh, that great city, in which there are more than 120,000 persons who do not know their right hand from their left, and also much cattle?” Jonah 4:11

alaskabibleteacher.com

The Four Ways We Grow

Then he told them many things in parables, saying, “Consider the sower who went out to sow. 4 As he sowed, some seed fell along the path, and the birds came and devoured them. 5 Other seed fell on rocky ground where it didn’t have much soil, and it grew up quickly since the soil wasn’t deep. 6 But when the sun came up, it was scorched, and since it had no root, it withered away.  Other seed fell among thorns, and the thorns came up and choked it. 

8 Still other seed fell on good ground and produced fruit: some a hundred, some sixty, and some thirty times what was sown. 9 Let anyone who has ears listen.”

Luke 8:5-9

Jesus loved to tell stories. Each of them was packed with truth, and the people loved them. In verse 2, we see the popularity of Jesus–the people were entranced by our Lord. They followed him throughout his earthly ministry. Just imagine a preacher doing this today.

If you were his disciple back then, you had better get used to crowds.

This is all about receptivity to the Kingdom of God. It’s all about seed that is sown indiscriminately–the work of the sower isn’t assessing the ground conditions. He just throws out the insignificant seed. That’s his job, and he seems to do a bang-up job of it. He “broadcasts” the seed, reaching in his bag and spreading it evenly, and quickly.

This parable, believed to be one of his first, begins with the word, “Consider,” and really, isn’t that the needed quality one must have? In the original language it simply means, “to see.” But it’s also in the imperative–a command. Seeing isn’t really an option–may be a good word today would be, “Look!” (And using an exclamation mark!)

In some places the ground had been packed down, things were too hard. Others landed on soil, but it was only the slightest skim of dirt, which wasn’t enough to support any growth. And yet the third scattering made it into the thorns. So there was three different possibilities, which none were ideal.

But wait! There was a fourth.

Seed that landed right where it should–good soil, fertile, tilled, and ready. The first three were all wrong, but the parable isn’t given to find fault–no one was to blame. And certainly not the sower, he was merely doing what was necessary.

The parable is clearly meant to explain how the Kingdom enters our hearts.

Our lives are the soil, and we all react to the seed differently. Sometimes, there’s no response at all, and “birds” get their breakfast. Sometimes, it’s all rocky, and nothing can grow there. Some tried to grow, but thorns and thistles essentially got in the way.

There are always four responses to the words of Jesus.

There was a lot of people sitting on the beach, and all were listening. But Jesus knew deep down that his words would only touch 1 out of 4, and yet he kept sowing. He hoped for good soil, but that wasn’t a given.

In verses 9-15, Jesus had to explain this story to his disciples, who always did seem out-of-touch with these sorts of things. But I’m glad he did–Jesus, by interpreting this parable, gave us the keys that would unlock every one of his others. The seed represents God’s words. The soil is the condition of our hearts. My own heart listens and when the Word comes my heart responds in different ways. At any given time, the soil can be hard as a rock, or thorny

Jesus was never mystical or otherworldly, he didn’t cloak his words in imponderable mysteries like every other teacher longs to do. (Ego, mainly.) He didn’t want things to be an enigma, rather he wanted people to understand the ways and nature of God’s kingdom.

He wanted even the little children to get it–there were to be no secrets, only receptive hearts.

“The Bible is shallow enough for a child not to drown, yet deep enough for an elephant to swim.”

     Augustine

alaskabibleteacher.com

The Real Glory of the Real Jesus

Mark 9:2-8, ESV

“And after six days Jesus took with him Peter and James and John, and led them up a high mountain by themselves. And he was transfigured before them, 3 and his clothes became radiant, intensely white, as no one on earth could bleach them. 4 And there appeared to them Elijah with Moses, and they were talking with Jesus. 

5 “And Peter said to Jesus, “Rabbi, it is good that we are here. Let us make three tents, one for you and one for Moses and one for Elijah.” 6 For he did not know what to say, for they were terrified.” 

“And a cloud overshadowed them, and a voice came out of the cloud, “This is my beloved Son; listen to him.” 8 And suddenly, looking around, they no longer saw anyone with them but Jesus only.”

I could go a hundred different ways with this passage. After much thought (disorganized most of the time) I’ve decided to go with the following. I know deep down how deficient it is, and I know you have much to add to it, which is very good.

But what I do understand I give to you.

The more I try to process Mark 9 the more I see things that are wildly significant. What happened there was radical, and I realize that I still don’t have a solid grip on it, and if I did I know deep down it’d change my life.

  • James, John, and Peter. Why these three? Some have suggested that these particular disciples were the ones who desperately needed to see what was going to happen. That’s very possible. Perhaps they were the weakest, and maybe they needed to see the real Jesus in His glory. My personal view is that these three wrote books, epistles. Maybe Jesus understood this, and gave them this earth-shaking experience?
  • The impact on Peter was profound. “”For we did not follow cleverly devised stories when we told you about the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ in power, but we were eyewitnesses of his majesty. 17 He received honor and glory from God the Father when the voice came to him from the Majestic Glory, saying, “This is my Son, whom I love; with Him, I am well pleased.”  We ourselves heard this voice that came from heaven when we were with him on the sacred mountain.” (2 Peter 1:16-18).
  • Toward the end of Peter’s life he couldn’t shake the Transfiguration and what he witnessed there. He recalled the “glory” but it seems it was the voice that was the most profound. It was that voice that completely altered his life and ministry. (Notice that he mentions it twice in verse 18.)
  • The Greek word for “transfigured” is metamorphosis. (Like a butterfly coming out of a cocoon.) Jesus wasn’t put in some spiritual “spotlight,” rather the glory that was seen was coming from inside Him. We see that He was God and Jesus revealed Himself clearly as God. The three disciples who were witnesses seem to struggle with exactly what took place. They use human analogies and images to try to explain to us what they saw.
  • The word “terrified” is the word phobia. Could it be that our encounter with God could go to that extreme? Could we be that we could be terrified in His presence? Does that fit into our theology? You need to decide if it’s significant or not.
  • And what about Moses and Elijah? Most feel that each represented the Law and the Prophets. I must point out that both had ministered from the top of mountains before? But notice, even though Jesus emanated extreme glory, these two did not. Also, the arrival of these two reinforces the real world of life after death. Both Moses and Elijah were very much alive!
  • The “human” part of Jesus was temporarily set aside. We know that Jesus was fully man, but here we see Him as He really is–fully and completely God. What a revelation! The three disciples were profoundly touched. Seeing the power and glory of the Creator of the universe on the top of the mountain altered their lives and changed their ministry.
  • John would write his Gospel and three letters. James wrote the first book in the NT. Peter is credited with the Gospel of Mark and his two books. They “knew” exactly who Jesus was! They had become fully convinced and needed no theological explanation. They finally understood!

So much more should be considered.

What I’ve written today is so incomplete–I feel a little foolish putting this down in this post. But yet I’m actively praying for you that this might add to your understanding. The Transfiguration is profound. It certainly needs to be internally processed by every real believer. And for those who don’t know Jesus yet, I hope you can understand exactly who He is to us who believe.

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.  He was with God in the beginning.  Through him all things were made; without him, nothing was made that has been made.  In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind.  The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.”

John 1:1-4, NIV

alaskabibleteacher.com

Trusting in Yourself: A Parable

Luke 18:9-14

“He also told this parable to some who trusted in themselves that they were righteous and looked down on everyone else: 10 “Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. 11 The Pharisee was standing and praying like this about himself: ‘God, I thank you that I’m not like other people—greedy, unrighteous, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. 12 I fast twice a week; I give a tenth of everything I get.’”

13 “But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even raise his eyes to heaven but kept striking his chest and saying, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner!’ , 14 I tell you, this one went down to his house justified rather than the other, because everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.”

He despised others. As a Pharisee he prided himself as a holy person; he stood before God and congratulated himself. I believe that self-righteousness has many levels. You can be blatant and obvious about it, or it can be subtle and hidden. But we must understand that the Father sees and knows. Notice the “all” here in Isaiah 64:6:

“We are all like one who is unclean, all our so-called righteous acts are like a menstrual rag in your sight. We all wither like a leaf; our sins carry us away like the wind.”

(Hmm. A menstrual rag? You got to be kidding!)

We often advance ourselves by demeaning those who struggle hard with their sin–there are those who see them and somehow suspect that they’re more superior. We don’t come out and say so; but we’ve arrived— but guess what— God (and scripture) knows better than this.

But we’re not dealing here with a hidden self-righteousness. The Pharisee truly believes that he is different from the tax-collector. He stands and doesn’t kneel. He feels comfortable and confident in the holy presence of God Almighty. He’s not like the others. He is sure that he’s holy.

But the tax-collector was brutally honest about himself.

He didn’t need anyone to tell him how sinful he was—he understood his own wickedness. This parable reveals God’s love for those who know that they’re twisted inside. Notice the heart of the tax-collector:

  • “He stood afar off” which showed his awareness of his separation from God.
  • “He wouldn’t even raise his eyes to heaven,” which declared his humility in the presence of God.
  • He kept “striking his chest,” which tells us of a deep pain over his sin against God.
  • He prayed, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner!’ This describes his desperate heart.

Both came to pray, but really, that’s all they had in common.

The Pharisee came to the temple to show off his righteousness, the tax-collector out of a terrible despair. It strikes me that the text in verse 11 says the Pharisee “began praying to himself.“ It seems that his prayer never really met God—he was proud and showy, and ended up doing the things God detests, (Prov. 29:23).

Things really heat up in verse 14. That’s the critical point of the entire story—“one went down to his house justified rather than the other.” Wow! What a statement. One professionally religious man, sure of his holiness, and the other a sinful sinner, who came humble and broken. One showed off his faith–boasting with a legalistic swagger. The other desperate and desolate, completely undone.

But it was the tax-man who became righteous in the eyes of God.

Humility is the foundation of the kingdom of Jesus. In Matthew 5:3-4 makes a lot of sense—to be “poor in spirit” and to “mourn” are the bedrock of a Christian’s discipleship. To be justified (made right) was a gift. He didn’t try to earn it, and there wasn’t a probationary period. The tax-collector now became righteous; the Pharisee carried his sin still inside him.

God wants us to have a broken-heart. He rejects everything else. I suppose that the question is this:

Do you truly mourn over your sin?

“The Lord is near the brokenhearted;
he saves those crushed in spirit.”

Psalm 34:18

Art by Eugène Burnand

Listen Closely to Matthew

“He went out again beside the sea, and all the crowd was coming to him, and he was teaching them. 14 And as he passed by, he saw Levi the son of Alphaeus sitting at the tax booth, and he said to him, “Follow me.” And he rose and followed him.

“And Levi jumped to his feet and went along.”

Mark 2:13-14, ESV

My name is Levi, and I once collected taxes for Rome. It was a very good living–it’s funny, but my parents chose my name– “Gift of God.” They were pious Jews who dreamed I would be more than I was. I sometimes wonder. Did they understand what Jesus was calling me to become?

As a tax collector, I was considered unclean. A very small step above a leper I guess. The Temple was off-limits for me; so I never had any sacrifice for my many sins. I carried my guilt like a heavy jacket on a hot day–some would say that God turned His back on me. I was seen as a collaborator, a betrayer of my people. I had been excommunicated forever.

Do you know what it’s like to be one of the damned?

My friends were sinners like me. In some dark way we understood each other, for we were all outcasts. Some of us were thieves, drunkards, and whores. Some of us were blind or disabled–all were undesirables. We became the community of those damned to hell.

My tax booth was situated at a crossroads, the ideal spot for collecting taxes. No one carrying goods could get by–they had to pay me first. I soon became wealthy, and unfortunately, very recognizable (which was dangerous). I had Roman guards that protected me.

There were times I wondered if that was all my life was good for, collecting coins for Rome.

Jesus was teaching near my booth one day.

I listened to Him closely. I prided myself as a good judge of character, I knew when someone was lying–my business taught me that. I immediately knew that I had never seen or heard anyone quite like Him.

Jesus quickly turned and stared directly at me. My heart stopped. I felt His eyes searching and I realized that He looked through me. He knew exactly who and what I was all about, and that unnerved me. I wasn’t seeing Him, rather it was He that saw me.

“Come, follow me.”

Suddenly I knew that all I attained in my business was a big pile of nothingness. I can never get over the shock of those words– Jesus, the Messiah wanted me. He had put His call on me, someone who was very much lost.

Why me? Who am I?

To follow wasn’t negotiable. I looked down at the silver and gold and realized they were nothing but piles of dirt. I left the coins on the table and walked away. If anything, I was sickened by my world of money.

I have never questioned that moment. What would you have done in my place but follow Him?

We had a grand going-away party that night. I of course invited all my disreputable friends. The rooms quickly filled up with whores, drunks, and the outcasts. Jesus shared many wonderful things with us. Never had anyone love us like Him.

We had never experienced this before!

“And as he reclined at table in his house, many tax collectors and sinners were reclining with Jesus and his disciples, for there were many who followed him. 16 And the scribes of the Pharisees, when they saw that he was eating with sinners and tax collectors, said to his disciples, “Why does he eat with tax collectors and sinners?” 

“And when Jesus heard it, he said to them, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”

Mark 2:15-17, ESV

The Pharisees were absolutely livid. They began to verbally rebuke Jesus and His disciples for setting down to eat and fellowship with us. In their minds we were the damned. My home was unclean, my family unclean–we were all filthy.

But that was not the way Jesus saw us. He loved us when nobody else would.

alaskabibleteacher.com

Photo: “Matthew, the Chosen”

Our Servant King Teaches Us

servant-king

“But it is not this way among you, but whoever wishes to become great among you shall be your servant.”

Mark 10:44

I’m processing something right now.

I suppose its implications could turn everything upside down,’ at least for me anyway. Some scientists have postulated that our planet is due for a complete magnetic switchover. This is when the north becomes south and vice versa. My issues at this moment are not quite that cosmic.

At this moment there are over 7,000,000,000 people living on planet earth.

(That’s seven billion.)

Sometimes I wonder if many of my issues come from not seeing this. I’m merely one drop in a vast sea of people. It also seems that there’s an intoxication of success when we become increasingly confused over ‘who’ we really are.

We think it’s about our efforts, maybe our giftedness. Perhaps it’s pride that drives us, even among mature Christian believers. But this is not the way of our Master. It’s unbecoming of a disciple.

3 “Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. 4 Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. 5 You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.”

Philippians 2:3-5

Jesus wasn’t driven like we seem to be.

We think we need to be more assertive, at least the Christian version of it, and push our way to the front. However, Jesus’ message and teaching were all about emptying Himself of being God and becoming a servant of servants. This is the arresting fact we fail to consider–

Jesus did all of this while wearing a towel, not a crown.

“Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into His hands, and that He had come from God and was going to God, 4 rose from supper and laid aside His garments, took a towel and girded Himself. 5 After that, He poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet.”  

John 13:3-5

He could have just done a ‘teaching’ on servanthood and I’m reasonably certain it would have been more than sufficient. But instead, Jesus put ‘skin on His words’ and actually got down on His knees to wash dirty feet. His disciples freaked out when they saw him do this.

It was something they could never forget.

“You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.

6 Though he was God,
    he did not think of equality with God
    as something to cling to.
7 Instead, he gave up his divine privileges;
    he took the humble position of a slave
    and was born as a human being.
When he appeared in human form,
8     he humbled himself in obedience to God
    and died a criminal’s death on a cross.“

Philippians 2:5-8, ESV

How can we not do this? This is a hard question to ask, but to be perfectly honest, does our discipleship include emptying ourselves daily? Can we find peace and fulfillment by becoming an unknown believer? An unknown, but only to God? Is this what we’re missing in becoming Christlike? These are very hard questions.

“Humility is perfect quietness of heart, It is to expect nothing, to wonder at nothing that is done to me, to feel nothing done against me. It is to be at rest when nobody praises me, and when I am blamed or despised.”

“It is to have a blessed home in the Lord, where I can go in and shut the door, and kneel to my Father in secret, and am at peace as in a deep sea of calmness, when all around and above is trouble.”   

Andrew Murray

Our discipleship will always short-circuit itself in the presence of pride.