To follow Him can be really hard. There doesn’t seem to be any contingency plans for any who are looking to escape such a drastic call. Jesus either is, or He isn’t our Lord. “Do you also want to leave?” This is a question that will be asked to every disciple–sometimes0once, and sometimes repeatedly.
There are these crystalline moments when I must make a decision. Will I take up my cross and go with Him? There doesn’t seem to be any room in Jesus’ band for ‘almost’ disciples. That scares me sometimes.
Today’s cross is waiting for me. I’m afraid at times that I won’t be able to take the next step as a true follower. Am I just fooling myself?
All of heaven seems to stand on tiptoe to see what I’m going to do next.
Who am I really?
Being obedient to Jesus is far from easy. We must have His Spirit.
“After this, many of his disciples left. They no longer wanted to be associated with him. Then Jesus gave the Twelve their chance:
“Do you also want to leave?”
“Peter replied, “Master, to whom would we go? You have the words of real life, eternal life. We’ve already committed ourselves, confident that you are the Holy One of God.”
John 6:66-69, The Message
“It is indeed praiseworthy for a believer to consecrate his life to the Lord, but he must never do so lightly or thoughtlessly. Before committing your life in service to God today, count the cost, for “No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God” (Luke 9:62).”
But I have this against you, that you have abandoned the love you had at first. 5 Remember therefore from where you have fallen; repent, and do the works you did at first. If not, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place, unless you repent.
“Anyone with ears to hear must listen to the Spirit and understand what he is saying to the churches.
Revelation 2:4-5, 7
I ministered full-time in San Francisco, preaching and teaching in a very difficult place for three years. The sin and degradation of that city were extremely difficult. But I suppose ministering in the city of Ephesus was also quite challenging. Like San Francisco, it was full of false idols, immorality, and much sinfulness. I encountered much of this. I’ve learned firsthand about evil powers in high places.
Paul knows what the Ephesians are up against, there is an organized evil in Ephesus that could very well destroy them. Paul is on his way to Jerusalem, and in order not to miss his boat, he requests that the elders of Ephesus meet him near his port. He has an urgent warning for them. He says “goodbye” with tears, and deep concern.
“So guard yourselves and God’s people. Feed and shepherd God’s flock—his church, purchased with his own blood—over which the Holy Spirit has appointed you as leaders. 29 I know that false teachers, like vicious wolves, will come in among you after I leave, not sparing the flock. 30 Even some men from your own group will rise up and distort the truth in order to draw a following.
31 Watch out! Remember the three years I was with you—my constant watch and care over you night and day, and my many tears for you.’
Acts 20:28-31
Keep in mind that Paul lived in Ephesus. He taught the church daily and prayed often for them for three years. Also, Apollos (a tremendous evangelist) would become a disciple there. Also, Timothy based his ministry in Ephesus.
There seems to be a slow drift away from the first love for Jesus and slippage into an unacceptable doctrine. During my own time in ministry in San Francisco, there always seemed to be resistance there, constant spiritual pressure on any attempt to stay faithful and live in purity.
In Revelation 2 an angel speaks to the church in Ephesus. His assessment wasn’t kind but yet it was accurate.
Apapyrus fragment from the book of Revelation chapter 2 written to the Ephesians by John the Apostle.
Maintaining the first love in this center of wickedness and depravity wasn’t easy.
Paul was in a Roman prison when he wrote to the Ephesians. He put pen to papyrus to write down and to show God’s purpose for them. He taught and preached, he knew that they must know the intentions of God for their lives.
In Acts 20 he states a warning to the elders of the church in Ephesus. They must be aware. And for the most, they stayed true, and yet they were missing a vital and critical truth. In Revelation 2 they are nailed and we must understand. They had somehow down the line they had lost their “first love.” This happens, regularly.
Jesus must be primary to the true walk of the real believer–this isn’t optional.
This is the critical definition of an authentic Christian. We must love Him first. The Ephesians had faithfully protected against heresy. But we discover good theology without real love isn’t acceptable.
We’re called to love Him first of all.
Living in a wicked world demands a love that exceeds the norm that isn’t acceptable to “polite society.” We must go on to love Him first. What we think we know isn’t going to be enough. We must love Him. Him!
Is Jesus our first love? And what does that really mean anyway?
You really must figure this out for yourself. But, the first step is humility.