“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”
Ephesians 4:29, ESV
In the spring of 1987 I was working with SOS Ministries in San Francisco. Our ministry house was on Sycamore in the Mission, a really rough place. There was ten of us and we were committed ourselves to street evangelism throughout the city. When I wasn’t on the street our in-house writing/printing took up a lot my time.
Vicky was our ministry secretary. She was young, outgoing, smart and a very good administrator. She was a whiz taking care of the office–and us. She was a vital part of the house. She was pretty much irreplacable.
Sometimes though we would clash, but never in a bad way.
But after time it seemed all I could only hear from her was criticism. And I began to get really angry. Our relationship grew testy over time and things began to fester inside of me. It’s funny, but now it was inconsquential.
But one day there was one of those moments I would regret even now after all these years. I had misconstrued that she was criticizing me. Whenever I was in the office it seemed she had it in for me.
I decided I must correct her. I believed she was way out of line it was up to me to set her straight.
“Vicky, I have a word for you, from God! Read Judges 16:16.“
“And when she pressed him hard with her words day after day, and urged him, his soul was vexed to death.”
As she grabbed her Bible and read the verse I could see the tears well up in her eyes. And I had used the Word of God like a cudgel, beating her with a billy club. I had bludgeoned her with a Bible verse.
What can I say? The memory of doing that has always stuck with me. I had wounded her spirit intentionally. Now the Father has forgiven me, I know that–but the lesson I learned has stuck with me through 30 years of ministering God’s Word.
“People who think they are religious but say things they should not say are just fooling themselves. Their “religion” is worth nothing.”
James 1:26, NCV
This quote drives this home:
“Five, or six, ten people shall be made temporarily wretched because one person, unconsciously perhaps, yet supremely, egotistic and selfish, has never learned to control his disposition and bridle his tongue.”
I really must warn you, if you’re hurting your brothers and sisters by speaking foolishness, the Father will deal with you. Sometimes harshly. Now there is definitely room to correct, but I suggest for every second of time you speak, you need to spend twenty minutes in real prayer, for them and for yourself.
You don’t discern to expose sin. You discern to pray and intercede. I think this is a good “rule of thumb” for us all.
Alaska Bible Teacher 